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I spent the morning with Zack, following him around like I did when I was little apparently. With Mary coming home on Sunday, he was starting to do some of the housework that he had been putting off while she was gone.

When I asked him why he was cleaning he told me that he wanted everything to be perfect when Mary got home. “I don’t think she should have to come home and clean here when she’s been working her butt off with Susan.”

“You are so whipped,” I jokingly told him.

“That may be Anna,” he laughed. “I make no excuses for it.”

I watched my brother as he pulled the cleaning supplies out from the cupboard. “You aren’t expecting Mary to put out when she gets home and it’s clean, are you?”

Zack looked over his shoulder at me, a grin on his face. “I don’t expect my wife to do anything she doesn’t wish too.” He closed the cupboard door and straightened up, “You’ll understand when you get married that you do things just to make your partner’s life easier, not for your own gain.”

I probably would’ve believed him if I didn’t see the look he had on his face when he started out of the kitchen with the cleaning products.

Two hours later, I flipped the vacuum off and scanned the family room; a room that I used to spend all my time in. I started to think about growing up in this house and all the times that I had my friends over. I started to think about Jordan and wondered where things got so complicated. Would he have made a move if Josh didn’t come into my life? Has he really felt this way about me for a while? If I don’t give him a chance, will I regret it later?

It all seemed so easy. It didn’t seem like it should be so hard to figure out if I should forget that Jordan says he has feelings for me or if I should act on them. With him being my best friend all this time, I knew that we got along really well, and I guess everyone assumes that we are perfect for each other already. If Josh wasn’t in the picture, I wouldn’t have to think twice at all; I would see where things went with Jordan.

But Josh is in the picture, I told myself. My feelings for him are so strong; I don’t want to give up what we have.

Collapsing on the couch, I held my head in my hands. I thought that all this would be over by now, Jordan seemed to be back to normal; he seemed to forget that he felt anything for me. When did he change his mind?

I knew I didn’t have to really ask, I knew when things changed again; the night that we all went out to celebrate, when I started to see him in another light. Why does it have to be so difficult? What am I going to do?

When Zack had to get ready to go to work, I left his house. He told me I was welcome to stay. “Maybe you should bring some stuff over tonight,” he told me as he walked me to the door. “I won’t be home until late but the girls will be here. I know they would love to see you.”

“I promised Josh that I would go over there after work, to talk about moving in with him.” Zack made a face, “What?”

He shook his head, “I still can’t believe that he asked you to move in. What was he thinking?” I told him I didn’t know. “Well, I hope he understands why you aren’t moving in.”

After reassuring him that Josh would understand, I gave Zack a hug and thanked him for being there for me. “That’s what I’m here for sis,” he said as he squeezed me extra hard. “I just wish that you would come to me before things get bad.”

“I know but I like to handle things for myself,” I smiled at him. “I don’t want to have to run to you for every little thing, that’s why you have kids!”

He laughed, “That is so true.”

He stood in the doorway, watching me until I drove off, just knowing that he was there to help me made me feel that everything would be ok.

Work that night wasn’t that exciting, it was busy but there wasn’t anyone interesting coming through the department. A couple times Bella came over to speak to me but it was too busy for us to really talk.

I was so ready for work to end when ten rolled around. I didn’t wait for anyone else, I didn’t stop to talk to anyone either. When someone tried to stop me to talk I told them I had something important I had to do as I continued to walk. I know it was probably rude, but I wanted to get home to Josh. I wanted to be in his arms.

The drive to his place seemed to take less time than normal; I was standing at his door in no time at all. I pulled out my key to slip it into the lock when the door swung open.

Looking very handsome and a little upset, Josh gazed down at me, “I’m glad you are here,” his voice was soft but it had a little edge to it. “I think we need to talk.”