How Do You Spell Fool? A-N-N-A?

I tried really hard not to laugh at Josh at that moment but I couldn’t help it. At first I just chuckled, then I giggled but that couldn’t even come close to how funny I thought his questions were. Within moments, I was laughing so hard that I had to hold onto him; I was that afraid I’d fall over.

“It’s not funny Anna!” Josh sounded so annoyed at me but that only made it worst. “Stop it!” He put his hands on my arms and held me away from his body as he glared down at me. “I don’t find this funny at all!”

“Ohhh Josssh!” I tried to speak but it came out all wrong, which made me laugh even harder. He let me go and I moved back in to hold on to him. My face was pressed against him jacket, my arms were wrapped around his waist. He didn’t say anything to me but I knew by the way he held himself that he wasn’t happy and the fact that he didn’t put his arms around me.

Taking deep breaths, I tried to stop the laughter that fell from my lips. “Oh!” I giggled and turned my face upwards. He was staring down at me, not smiling, his eye brow was raised. “Are you done?” I didn’t trust myself not to laugh, so I just nodded. Moving me away once again he asked me what was so funny.

“You think I would rather be with Jordan?” I chuckled, shaking my head. The look on his face when he nodded, kind of killed everything I thought was funny about the questions. “Josh no! There is only one man I want to be with and that’s you!” I couldn’t believe that he thought I wouldn’t want to be with him.

“Then what the hell were you doing in there? I wasn’t sure if you were going to jump him and hump his leg the way you were talking to him!” He was so upset; it made me feel so horrible that I cause him that kind of pain.

“Josh,” I whispered his name and tried to move into him again but he wouldn’t let me.

“No,” he shook his head. “If I let you touch me, I’ll forget what I’m so upset about until later and then I’ll stress over what it meant. I want to know what was going on in there.”

I sighed, “I don’t know how to explain it Josh.” I shrugged my shoulders and sighed again. “I’m not in any way shape or form lusting over Jordan. I do not want to be with him, the thought of actually touching him like….” I shuddered and couldn’t even finish that thought.

“Honey, Jordan is my friend and I want what’s best for him. At first I wasn’t sure about him with Bella just because I didn’t want to see what happened with Heather, happen all over again. But Jordan is acting a little different with Bella, I know you probably don’t notice it but I do. He seems so much happier since she said she’d go with him tonight. I just…” I looked up at Josh, his face was void of any emotion, he was just listening and watching me.

“I guess you can say I am a little jealous of Bella.” Josh jerked his head to the side for a moment before he looked at me again. “But it’s not in the way you think. It’s not because I want Jordan, it’s because I’m afraid that she’ll end up doing what Heather did and tell him he can’t see me.” I sighed; I knew I wasn’t making sense. “I thought if Bella knew that we were just really good friends, that nothing else was there, she would be ok with our friendship.” I searched Josh’s face for any sign that he understood what I was trying to do, what I was trying to say. “I screwed up though, didn’t I?”

“Yes,” Josh replied immediately. “From where we all were sitting, it seemed like you were interested in taking him home.”

“I just wanted her to see he’s a good guy,” I hung my head in shame. “I didn’t mean to make you question my feelings for you.” I sniffled; I felt so close to tears. Oh God what have I done? What if Josh didn’t try to talk to me? What if he just left? I tilted my head back and looked up into his eyes. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, I didn’t -” my voice broke as tears slowly rolled down my cheeks. “I’m so sorry Josh.”

“Anna,” Josh tilted my face back up to his. “Bella is your friend and she seems like a nice person, I don’t see why she would do anything to purposely hurt you. As for how she sees Jordan, do you realize that when you spoke about him while you were at work, she got all she needed to know from you about him?”

“I never thought about that,” I admitted. “But Josh, oh!” I groaned, “I’m so sorry, I don’t know how you put up with me.”

Finally Josh let me near him; he wrapped his strong arms around my body and held me tight. “It’s not easy but it’s the being without you that I can’t handle.”