Party Till Clean Up Time

Even though I told her she could say anything to me, I wasn’t looking forward to hearing what she had to say. I knew there was no way she was ok with everything that went down, she had already expressed doubts about our relationship. So I was expecting the worst when she started to speak again.

“I recall a moment a couple months ago where this really bold young woman stood in my kitchen and pretty much told me off for having doubts about her intentions towards my son,” Helen glanced over at Josh and then back at me. “As a mother, I had ever right to be concerned, the young woman had yet to be in a relationship that lasted more than six months and there were rumors that her best friend and roommate was more than that to her. But yet, she stood there and told me that she loved my son and there was no need to worry because she didn’t plan on ever hurting him.”

“I didn’t plan on it Helen, I had no desire to hurt Josh then or now.”

“But you did, you hurt him by doing the one thing that you swore you would never do, with the one person who you assured Joshua would never be an issue.”

I lowered my head, “Helen there is no excuse for what I did, I won’t make excuses for it either. I know it was wrong, it shouldn’t have happened and there isn’t a day that goes by when I don’t kick myself in the butt for it.” I took a deep breath and I looked back up at her. “I’m more surprised than anyone that Josh is giving me some kind of chance here, I didn’t expect him to ever want to talk to me again even though I knew in my heart that he had to be missing me as much as I was missing him.”

Helen shook her head and I asked her what was wrong. “This past month was hard on Joshua; he was trying to be strong for his father and siblings when I had my heart attack, dealing with the on going stress involved with trying to get custody of Jesse and having to live with the heart ache that you caused him but yet he managed to get through it all and actually seemed fine. When I asked him about it a week or so ago, do you know what he told me?”

I shook my head, I had no idea.

“Joshua told me that you got him through it all.” I frowned and Helen smiled. “I know that’s what I was thinking too but then he told me about the calls he made to you when he was feeling like his whole world was falling apart,” Helen paused. “He did tell you about that, didn’t he?”

“Yes,” I smiled as I remembered the blocked calls.

Helen stared at me for a while before she spoke again. “I was so mad at you when I found out what you did; I couldn’t believe that you would hurt Joshua like that when you seemed to love him so much.” I went to tell her I do love him but she held up her hand and continued. “When Joshua told me that he turned to you when everything was getting to be too much, I thought he was crazy and I told him as much.” Helen paused and she smiled at whatever it was she was thinking. “He told me that he didn’t care how crazy it sounded or what people thought, he needed someone he could turn too who would be there for him and you were the only one he felt comfortable reaching out too. Joshua told me that just because he was upset with what happened, it didn’t change how he felt about you.”

I couldn’t help but smile, just hearing that even then Josh was still telling people he loved me. I turned to look for Josh in the playroom and say him kneeling down with the kids as they played a ‘passing and unwrapping’ game, he looked so happy.

“Joshua wants more children,” his mother said out of the blue. I turned to her and nodded, I knew he did. “There is a certain happiness vibe coming from him today,” Helen stated. “At first I thought it was because it was Jesse’s birthday and he got to finally spend one with him but as the day wore on and you showed up, I realized that it was only part of the reason.”

“I never want this happy vibe to ever leave Joshua,” Helen put her hand on my arm and looked me dead in the eyes. “Anna please don’t ever let that happen again.”

I told her I would do anything in my power to keep him happy for as long as he would let me. “I love him Helen that never changed once.”

Soon the game was over and Josh was leading all the kids to the table for cake and juice. Once the kids were all seated, he came over to me and asked me to give him a hand with the cake. He led me into the other room and I spotted the huge cake box sitting on the counter. “Let me guess,” I said as I made my way over to it. “It’s a ‘Cars’ cake, isn’t it?”

Josh laughed as he came up behind me, “How did you ever guess?” He helped me open the box and then pointed to the bag on the counter that had the number ‘3’ candle in it. As I fumbled with the packaging, Josh wrapped his arms around my waist and held me tight; once the candle was free, I asked him where I could put it. He thought for a moment and then asked me to put the candle in the top left of the cake, “I don’t want to ruin the picture,” he told me as I looked down at Lightning McQueen on the race track. “Plus, that way the candle will be closer to Jess when he blows it out.”

I asked him how it would be closer as I took down the sides of the cake box. “Wouldn’t the bottom be right in front of Jess?” Josh laughed and told me I was distracting him and he meant the bottom left. “Sure,” I grinned. “So are you taking it out or…?”

“Of course I am!” He exclaimed and then removed his arms from my waist, “It’s my honor as his daddy to carry the cake on this day but if you wouldn’t mind getting the door…”

I held the door for Josh and lit the candle, then watched him walk through into the other room while singing ‘Happy Birthday’. When Josh set the cake down carefully on the table Jesse’s two little eyes widen in surprise, “Jesse cake big daddy!”

Josh told Jesse to make a wish and then blow out the candle. “Wish daddy?” Jesse looked around the room and then closed his eyes really tight, his little lips moving as he whispered something. “Ok,” he looked at his dad and sucked in a big mouthful of air. “You help daddy?” He asked, losing all his ‘air’ so he had to take another deep breath. Josh helped Jesse blow out his candle and cut his cake.

When all the kids had their fill of cake and juice, Jesse asked if he could open his presents now, “Conner say ‘sents next daddy!”

Josh led Jesse and the others over to the pile of gifts on the table in the far corner, “Sit in your chair Jess,” Josh told him as he turned to get some gift to hand him.

I stood on the outskirts of the group with Josh’s family and watched Helen go over to Josh to tell him to sit with Jess and she would hand him the gifts. When Josh tried to get Jess to open the first gift he refused too. “Where Ama?” He asked his daddy. “Ama help too daddy.”

I hesitated at first when Josh looked in my direction but soon I was making my way over to join my two favorite guys in the whole world. I sat on the other side of Josh, smiled up at him and then laughed when Jesse stood up and come over to plop down in my lap.

There wasn’t a gift that Jesse opened where he wasn’t excited about it; clothes or toys, it didn’t matter he would always say, ‘look daddy!’ There were a few cards in the pile from some of Josh’s aunts and uncles who couldn’t make it, when Jesse opened the first one he got excited to see the photo on the front of the card, it was Lightning and Mater. “Look Daddy!” He exclaimed waving the card and when something fell out, he scooped down to pick it up. “Oh,” he turned to Josh and whispered. “I sorry daddy no Jesse,” he held out $20 to his daddy.

Josh chuckled, “It is yours Jesse!” He tucked the money into Jesse’s pants pocket and explained it to him.

When all the presents were opened, it was pretty much time for everyone to leave. While Josh worked on cleaning up, Jesse and I stood at the door with the box of goodie bags that Josh and I put together. Jesse handed every kid a bag and then said, ‘Thanks for coming!”

With the clean up done and the last of the kids gone, Josh went to find the owner of the building to tell him they were done. Tim, Matt and Rob carted all the gifts and leftover party stuff out to Josh’s car while I stood outside with Josh’s parents and the guys families; Josh’s sisters had already left by this time.

“Ok,” Josh came over to us and thanked everyone for coming out and helping. “I know I will never forget this day and I’m sure Jesse won’t either.” He called out to Jesse who was playing with Conner, Jenna and Megan. “It’s time to go Jesse, say good bye to your friends.”

All the kids came running over and Jesse stood at his father’s feet and stared up at him with a confused look on his face. “Daddy Ama say we play!”

Josh raised a brow in my direction, “Did she really?”

I stared at Jesse as he nodded and wondered when I said we would. “Oh!” I looked at Josh, “Musical chairs!” Josh shot me a confused look. “When he wanted to end the game early, I told him I would play with him when he was done playing with his friends. I didn’t mean…” I trailed off as Josh seemed to get what I was saying. “Yeah so,” I shrugged.

“So you said you would play with him,” Josh gave me this evil grin. “I think it’s only right that you do what you said you would, unless you have something else you have to do?”

I didn’t have anything I needed to do, I was just going to go back to Chad’s and try to keep the kids amused for the next couple hours. “I was just watching the kids,” I told him with a smile.

Josh glanced at Jess and then the other kids. “I don’t see where that would be a problem,” he told me.

“Are we going to Jesse’s house Aunt Anna?” Conner looked up at me expectantly.

I looked at Josh and he nodded. “Yes Conner,” I smiled at him. “It looks like we are.”

Conner and Jesse started to jump up and down saying ‘yay’; Jenna saw this and joined in without really knowing why they were doing it. Megan ran over to Matt and her mom, “I go play?” She asked her parents as she pointed over to the boys and Jenna.

Matt and Kerri looked at each other for a moment and then Matt looked at Josh, who told him he would love to have Megan join us; so Megan soon joined the boys and Jenna in their jumping around and ‘yay’ing.