Promise Of Friendship

I didn’t know what to say to that, so I asked. “What do you mean Jordan? What kind of father do you think Jenna needs?”

Jordan rubbed his hand over his face and sighed, “She needs the type of dad that I can’t be Anna.”

“That’s not answering my question Jordy.”

“Jenna needs a dad like…” Jordan hesitated for a brief second before he continued. “Like Josh.”

Frowning, I stared at him. “What do you –” I laughed because I realized that was probably the third time I asked that question. “Why do you think Jenna needs a dad like Josh?”

Jordan rolled his eyes, “Like you don’t know,” he scoffed. “I don’t know how he does it Anna, or where he finds the time. Not only does he work full time and is in the beginning of a new relationship with you; he also has the time and energy to want to be a full time father? Is he crazy going for full custody of a two year old who wants so much attention?” He closed his eyes, “Anna I don’t think I could ever do what he’s doing. I could never even imagine attempting to take care of Jenna by myself. I know I would screw that up.”

“Jordan! You wouldn’t! If you were in the same boat as Josh, if you believed there was something wrong at Heather’s, you wouldn’t hesitate to do everything you could to make sure that Jenna grew up to be happy and strong.”

“No Anna,” Jordan shook his head. “I don’t think that I would. I love Jenna, I haven’t known her long but I know I love her. But I don’t think I could be a single father, ever.”

I shook my head, I didn’t agree with him. I knew Jordan a lot better than that but I also knew that there was no point in arguing with him when he made up his mind. “So are you telling me that you have no desire to see Jenna?”

“No!” Jordan snapped at me. “That’s not what I’m telling you at all. I want to see Jenna; I want to be a part of her life. I just won’t be a single dad.”

I chuckled softly, “Well Jordan technically you are a single dad.”

“Ha ha,” he gave me a half grin. “I meant that I wouldn’t be in charge of her daily schedule. I won’t go after Heather for full custody, like Josh is doing with Carol.”

“No one ever said that you had to go for full custody Jordan. You have to stop comparing yourself to Josh, the situation with Carol and Jesse is a lot different than the one with Heather and Jenna.”

Jordan nodded, “I know. I just thought you wanted me to do it.”

“What!?!” I stared at him in disbelief. “Why on earth would you think that?”

“Because you love kids,” he said softly. “You seem to think that I’ll be a good father.” He shrugged, “I don’t want to disappoint anyone.”

“Oh Jordy!” I wrapped my arms around his waist. “I do think you’ll be a great daddy to Jenna but I don’t expect you to take over her primary care giving. I want you to be happy Jordan, and I know that just being in Jenna’s life will make you happy.”

He smiled, “And it means that you get to be in her life too.”

“Are you kidding me? Of course I want to be in her life! Jordy you are my best friend, I’m entitled to be an aunt to any child you have. I deserve that privilege after putting up with you for all these years!”

“I wasn’t that bad,” Jordan laughed.

“No? Then I wish for Jenna to be just like you were.” I grinned when Jordan’s smile disappeared.

“Oh God! She’s never leaving the house! I’m telling Heather that Jenna is going into a convent, now!”

“But you weren’t that bad,” I laughed. “Isn’t that what you just said?”

Jordan glared at me, “I wasn’t. It was the friends I hung around with.”

It was well after 1 am when Jordan finally told me that he had to go to bed. “Babe you know I’d love to stay up and talk,” he yawned. “But I have to get up soon.”

“I know,” I pouted. I didn’t want the night to be over; I didn’t realize how much I missed having these late night chats with Jordan.

We crawled off the couch and made our way down the hall. “Promise me something,” I asked as I turned in my doorway to look towards his.

“What’s that Anna?” He leaned against his doorframe, his eyes half closed with sleep.

“Promise me that we’ll do this again? That we’ll take time for us,” I bit my lip as I waited for him to respond.

Jordan pushed off the doorframe and made his way over to my door. “Anna,” he whispered as he pulled me into his arms. “I promise that I’ll always be ready for ‘us’.”