Unexpected

My first day of work for the New Year and I slept in. I was shaken awake by Conner a half hour after I was planning on getting up. “Aunt Anna, you want to play trucks with me?” He was kneeling on my bed pushing two trucks over the blankets on my legs.

“Sure.” I sat up and held my hand out for one of the trucks when I noticed the time. “Oh my god!” I leapt out of bed, nearly knocking him on the floor. “Sorry, I’m going to have to take a rain check; I have to go to work.” I kissed his cheek before lifting him onto the floor.

He pouted, “No one plays with me.” I watched as he sullenly walked out of my room. Being the only boy had to be hard on him; whenever everyone was together he was always left out, playing in the corner by himself because the girls didn’t want to play with trucks and stuff. Most times I ended up playing with him, or my brothers do but he wanted someone his own age to play with. I thought about Jesse then, and wondered if he and Conner would get along, if Josh would bring him by sometime before Chad leaves in a couple days. I made a mental note to ask him when I talk to him again.

Glancing at the clock again, I quickly got dressed and threw all of stuff into my bag. I was going home after work tonight, and hopefully I’ll work things out with Jordan.

Time seemed to drag at work, maybe it was because I wasn’t in the mood to be there. I tried to keep busy in hopes that time would fly by but after helping the department manager setup the new MODs there wasn’t really anything to do but wait for someone to come by and need help, or need something from the risers. This was one day that I wished for the needy customers and they were no where in sight.

On my break, I tried calling Jordan. He wasn’t answering his cell and when I called his work, they told me he was too busy to talk, even though I swear I heard him in the background. I had no idea what I was going to say to him when I got home, hell, I didn’t even know if he would be home when I got there.

Before I had left work, I called our favorite pizza place and ordered a couple pizzas to be delivered. Jordan can’t resist pizza so I figured this would be a good way to break the ice and get him to at least give me a chance to explain, apologize and beg for forgiveness.

The house was dark when I pulled into the driveway, if I didn’t see the flicker of the TV through the living room window; I would’ve thought he wasn’t home. I let myself in the front door, flipping on the outside light so the delivery guy wouldn’t think we weren’t home. Dropping my bag on the floor, I walked into the living room. Jordan was lying on the couch covered from the waist down in a blanket flipping through the channels, stopping every once in a while. I had hoped that he would look up when I walked in but he didn’t, he didn’t acknowledge that I was there at all. I put on a smile and tried to sound cheerful. “Hey, I didn’t feel like cooking so I ord-” My words trailed off when I noticed the dirty dishes on the table. “You already ate?” I was shocked, and a little upset. I know it may not seem like a big deal to anyone else but it was to me. As long as Jordan and I have lived together, if the other was going to be home close to meal time, we’d always wait for them. I stared at him but I might as well have not even been in the house for all he noticed. I started to say something when the doorbell rang. “More for me I guess.”

After paying the delivery guy, I grabbed some napkins and two plates; just in case he decided he wanted some. The pizza boxes were hot to the touch, and the aroma was making my stomach growl in anticipation. Laying the boxes on the table, I slid down on the floor with my back against the couch. Jordan propped himself up on his elbows as I opened the top box – pepperoni, bacon and mushrooms with both mozza and cheddar cheeses – and picked out a slice.

“Oh hot!” I exclaimed as I laid the slice on my plate and blew on my fingers. Picking up the slice again, I opened my mouth and bit into it, the cheese was stringing from my mouth to the pizza as I pulled it away. “Ohhhh! Mmmmm!” I groaned as I chewed the piece slowly, savoring every flavor. I knew I was laying it on thick, but it seemed to be working Jordan was eyeing the pizza like it was about to be his last meal. He sat up, I thought he was going to reach for a slice but instead he stood up. I don’t know why it is, but it seems that when you find out that someone likes you, you tend to look at them a little differently. Normally, if Jordan were to get up I wouldn’t really pay much attention to him but this time out of the corner of my eye I found myself checking him out. He was 6 feet and weighed about 170 pounds; he wasn’t a big guy but he was in good shape. Wearing a raggedy old t-shirt and boxer shorts, with his hair all messed up from laying down he looked good, comfortable. And ready for bed, I found myself thinking as my eyes slid down his body. Absently, he slid his arm under his shirt and scratched his chest while he watched something on TV and then he walked out of the room. Sighing, I dropped my pizza on the plate and stared at it, cursing it for not working the way I had expected it too. He should’ve gone for some, he never turned down pizza. It was supposed to be the ice breaker! I jumped when Jordan stepped over my legs and sat on the couch next to me. When he leaned over to hand me a can of Pepsi, his leg brushed against my shoulder.

“So ummm,” He picked up the other plate and nodded to the other box. “Is that one what I think it is?”

I smiled, “Yes, beef, onions and mushrooms with both cheeses.” I lifted the cover and showed it to him. He grinned, pulled a slice from the box and started to eat it. He took a second bite and stopped in mid chew. “What?” He asked, looking down at me.

I turned away; I didn’t realize I was staring. “Nothing.”

Jordan slid off the couch and sat next to me and elbowed me until I looked at him again. “You can admire me when I’m done eating.” He joked and I smiled.

We didn’t say too much while we were eating, he asked me about my day and we talked about his. Finally, he had laid down his plate and rubbed his stomach, “I think you are trying to fatten me up.” He brought his can of Pepsi to his lips and finished it off.

“You have some sauce on your lip.” I told him as I passed him a napkin.

He held the napkin for a moment, staring at it. I asked him what was wrong and he smiled at me. “Nothing, just thinking of another way to remove the sauce. Wanna try?” He asked as he wiped at his mouth with the napkin.

I didn’t say anything; I stared at the uneaten crust on my plate, trying to think of what I wanted to say about yesterday. I wanted to talk about it now when he was in a good mood. He stood up before I could say anything, “Jordan?”

He held out his hand to me, hesitantly I took it. He pulled me off the floor and wrapped his arms around my waist. “Babe, what you did yesterday was so wrong.” I nodded in agreement. “Calling my brother to get me to leave? Was totally unnecessary, all you had to do was ask me to go. Sure, I would’ve been upset but it wouldn’t have been so bad if you just told me what you were thinking.” He pulled back and looked down at me. “I know I took you by surprise and my timing probably isn’t that great seeing Stalker boy is in the picture, I was tired of hiding it and seeing you with him freaked me out. I’m sorry.”

I was confused to say the least, he didn’t do anything wrong, I was the one who messed up. “Why are you apologizing to me?”

“When you didn’t come home last night, I realized that I was unfair to you. I know you are interested in Josh, and I know you are very confused about what to do about the fact that he’s married. I wasn’t thinking about you when I told you, I was thinking about myself and how jealous I am that he can swoop in here, take you away and I can’t do a damn thing about it.” He took a deep breath. “Babe, I love you and I want you to be happy.”

“Jordan what are you saying? You didn’t mean what you said?”

He shook his head, “No, I meant everything I said I do care about you, I do love you and I do want to make you happy.”

“But?”

“But I think that the best way for me to ensure that you are happy is to be your friend and be there for you whenever you need me.”

I saw red, be my friend? I punched him in the arm. “You got to be freaking kidding me!” I pushed him away. “You tell me you love me, kiss me and have me worrying about what will happy to our friendship if we get together or not and now you are telling me to forget it and you just want to be friends? What the hell kinda game are you playing Jordan?”

“Neither one!” He grabbed me by the shoulders forcing me to looking into his eyes. “You don’t seem to be too keen on the idea of being with me, so I figured I’d save you the trouble of worrying about our relationship if you told me no.”

“Damn it Jordan!” I twisted out of his grip. “Don’t do this to me, don’t get there and think you know what I’m thinking! Hell! I don’t even know what I’m thinking.” I turned to look out the living room window, wiping away the tears that trailed down my cheeks. “Funny, about 7 years ago, I would’ve jumped at the chance to be with you but you weren’t interested in me then either.”

“What do you mean?” Jordan came up behind me and turned me to face him.

I shook my head, “It doesn’t matter Jordan once again you decided that it won’t happen, without even thinking to talk to me.”