Breakfast Confessions

The night ended with Josh and I making love. There couldn’t have been a better way to end the day. As I fell into a dreamless sleep, I couldn’t help but feel completely happy about my life at that moment.

The morning came and with it came the sad fact that the man I love with all my heart and soul, had to leave me to go to work. It was so difficult for me to watch him as he drove away, even knowing that we would be together again in a few short hours didn’t make it any easier. I knew I was being silly, but I found myself missing him.

Ok, you need to snap out of this right now! I scolded myself. He’s going to think you are crazy if you tell him this, you know that. I grinned. No, he’ll probably tell you he loves you and missed you just as much. He is that much of a romantic and you love it!

Once Josh left and I got over missing him, well over enough to shower and get dressed. I went home to see if Jordan was up. I walked into a dark house and no one answered when I called out. I thought it was strange, so I made my way down the hall to his room, but he wasn’t there. And then I remembered that he was working again. And his truck wasn’t in the driveway either; you think that would’ve been a clue.

Without thinking about it, I hopped back in my car and drove over to the garage. I have visited Jordan at work so many times over the years that the guys don’t even bat an eye when I walk into the shop. “Hey Jordan! Your girlfriend is here.” Tony, the service manager yelled into the shop as he held the door open for me. No matter how many times we tried to explain it to the guys he works with, they never seem to believe us. So finally we gave up and let them think whatever they want.

“Hey Babe,” Jordan peeked out from beneath the hood of a car. “Does Josh know you are out roaming the streets, dropping into garages just to check out the guys?”

I laughed, “He knows he has no worries about competition. There isn’t a man alive who can even come close to him.”

“Hand me that,” Jordan motioned to the wrench that was sitting on the table next to him. I picked it up by the end of its handle and made a face. “It’s not going to hurt you.”

“If I drop it, it might!” I smiled. “So are you going to tell me or what?”

Jordan chuckled, “You are just dying to know, aren’t you?”

“Yes!” I closed the space between us. “Come on tell me something Jordy. I need to know.”

Jordan glanced up at me, sighed and then stood up to face me. “It wasn’t easy babe, she didn’t want me to see Jenna but I sweet talked her and she gave in.” He bent back over the car. “It helped that her father was on my side. Which shocked the hell out of me.”

“Argh! Jordy!” He glanced at me and smiled. “You are doing this on purpose!”

He nodded, “Yes, I like knowing something you don’t. Now why don’t you go find something to do so I can get back to work?”

I frowned, “Will you be home tonight?”

“Anna, I’m always home. Will you be home?”

“I don’t know. It depends on what Josh’s plans are for tonight.”

Jordan shook his head, “You used to do whatever you wanted, when you wanted. Now, you wait for him to tell you what you are doing.”

“That’s not true!”

“No? Then tell me, what are you doing tonight?”

My first thought when he asked that was, did Josh mention wanting to do something special. I heard Jordan sigh, “I’ll be home sometime after 7. I’m going to try and spend a few minutes with Jenna after I get off work.”

I left the shop wondering if Jordan was right, was I focusing too much of my time and attention on Josh? Am I sitting by and waiting for him to plan my life? By the time I got in my car, I decided that Jordan was wrong. Sure I spent a lot of time with Josh and he was in my mind all the time but I did many things without him and I plan stuff without him. Jordan just feels left out, that’s all. He’s not used to having to really share my attention anymore. But now that Jenna’s in his life, he won’t have as much time to spend with me anyway.

I drove around town for a while; I didn’t have anything I had to do. It wasn’t until I drove by the Tim Horton’s that I remembered I was going to call Hank and see how he was. I pulled over onto the side of the road and dialed his number. I wasn’t sure that anyone would answer as the third ring went in; in fact, I was hoping that Heather wouldn’t be there and answer the phone. “Hello?” The very groggy, gruff voice that answered the phone was thankfully Hank.

“Hello Hank, it’s Anna.” I happened to glance at my clock and saw that it was only 9.

Hank groaned, “Hey Anna. How are you doing?”

“I’m doing ok. I didn’t mean to call so early, I didn’t realize the time.”

“No, no.” He mumbled, “It’s fine. I should be getting up now anyway. Where are you?”

I smiled, “I’m sitting on the street in my car. Did you still want to talk?”

“Mmhmm, yeah.” He yawned, “I have to shower, try to wake up a little. Come by in a half hour?”

When I told him I would, he started to give me directions and then laughed, “I guess you already know where I live.” I told him I did, and we hung up just after.

With 20 minutes to kill, I drove to A&W to grab something for us for breakfast. I wasn’t sure what he would like, so I just ordered a couple of each of the bacon, ham and sausage eggers along with a couple hash browns, orange juice and coffee. I love the food at A&W, sure it’s a little bit more expensive than eating at McDonalds but I find it’s so much better.

By the time I got to Hank’s place, I was technically late; it was 5 minutes after the half hour he said. I was actually looking forward to sitting down and talking with Hank, not only because he’s Heather’s boyfriend and I wanted to find out some stuff. Grabbing the bags of food and the tray of drinks, I made my way to his apartment and rang his doorbell.

Hank came to the door with a couple toys in his hand. “I was just cleaning up a little,” he said when I asked about the toys. He moved aside to let me in and that’s when he noticed the food in my hands. His face lit up, “Oh! You brought breakfast!”

He relieved me of the food and led the way to the kitchen table. “I’m glad that you called, I wasn’t sure if I dreamt that I actually went to your work last night.” He stopped in the mist of pulling the food out of the bag. “Your boyfriend was nicer than I thought he would be. I don’t know if I would’ve been that kind to someone who kept coming around Heather.”

“What do you mean?” I sat down and pulled a juice from the tray.

“Well, I was pretty drunk but I remember telling him that you were the best.”

I nodded, “He thinks so too.”

Hank laughed, “Yeah but I believe I told him if I was single, I’d make a play for you.”

The Night At Home

When Josh told me that he wanted to show me how much I meant to him, I honestly thought he was going to take me to bed and make love to me all night long. So it’s needless to say that I was a little surprised when he led me to the bathroom instead of the bedroom.

The door was partially closed to the bathroom, I lifted my hand to push it opened and he stopped me. “Just give me one minute,” he said as he touched his fingers to my cheek, “I have to do some thing first. Close your eye.” He chuckled at my questioning look. “Just trust me, close them.”

I did as he asked, and he disappeared into the bathroom. Ok, I peeked when I heard him push the door open but it was still pretty dark in there so I don’t know what he was doing. “Still got them closed?” He called out. I quickly squeezed my eyes shut again.

“Yes! Josh what are you doing? I feel so silly standing here with my eyes closed.”

“No, you look beautiful.” He whispered, his hands gripped my hips and he pulled me to him. “Just a few more minutes,” his lips brushed against my closed eyelids. He led me into the bathroom and I heard the door click as it closed. Why is he closing the... his lips were on mine before I could even finish that thought. His kiss was so soft, so tender I felt it throughout my entire body.

Josh lifted my hands to his shoulders before his slid back down over my body to grasp my shirt. In one swift movement, he had managed to remove and discard my shirt and then he moved on to my pants. His fingers rested just beneath the waist of my pants, he lifted his lips from mine and kissed a trail over my jaw, down my neck and shoulder.

I tried to pull him closer, to hold my body tight against his but he held himself out just enough that I couldn’t. “Josh,” I groaned in frustration. I could feel him smile against my skin but he just continued his trail of kisses. From my shoulder, he crossed half of my chest and started down through the valley of my breast. I found myself taking a deep breath and holding it, as he hesitated there but as much as we both wanted him to, he didn’t touch or kiss my breast. Sinking to him knees he continued down until his lips touched his fingers at my waist.

I thought I would die as I waited for him to remove my pants, I had made a move to do it myself but he moved my hands away. “Let me do it,” he whispered. As his fingers undid my pants, he nibbled softly on my flesh, sending shivers throughout my body. I lifted my hands to his head and entwined my fingers in his hair. Once my pants were removed, his mouth moved down to my panties, his teeth gripped the band and he moved the front down wards while his fingers gripped the sides. Soon, my panties were in the pile at my feet but Josh wasn’t done, his hands traveled up my calves to just above my knees. “Anna?” He nudged my legs open slightly.

“Mmmm?”

“Have you opened your eyes yet honey?”

“Nooh!” I gasped as he gently nipped at the skin of my inner thigh.

He chuckled, “You can open them now.”

I opened my eyes and gazed down at him. There was something about seeing the man you love down on his knees in front of you that just makes you feel all tingly inside, and I was certainly feeling tingly. I watched as he pressed his lips against my tummy as his eyes gazed into mine. “Did I get it right?”

“Get what right?”

He glanced around the room and I did too. “I think I have everything you told me that night.”

“Oh Josh,” I bit my lip; I thought I was going to cry. “I didn’t think you were wake when I mentioned this.”

A couple nights ago, Josh and I were talking, he was actually trying to sleep and I was trying to keep him awake so I told him about one of the things I would love a guy to do for me. I mentioned how I always wanted to come home to have my man waiting for me at the door with a smile; he wouldn’t say anything but I knew he was up to something. He’d take me by the hand and lead me into the bathroom that was lit by ‘moonlit walk/wandering stream’ candles. In the flickering candlelight he would remove all my clothes, layer by layer, kissing and nibbling on every inch of my skin. After I was naked and trembling for him, he would show me the hot bubble bath that he had drawn for me.

He chuckled, “Not awake when you are telling me your hopes and dreams?” He stood up, taking my hand in his. “I couldn’t find the candles you were talking about,” he frowned as he looked at the candle on the vanity.

I laughed, “I thought I could smell tangerines!” I threw my arms around his neck, “Oh Josh this is the best!”

“I didn’t know what else to buy, and I knew you liked them.” He explained. “I just have to run the water; I didn’t want it to be cold by the time you got home.”

He turned to the taps and played around with them until the water temperature was too his liking. “Now,” he looked at me. “While we wait for that, here you go.” He drew my attention to the little table that I didn’t notice before, lifting a glass from it he handed it to me. “I added a couple things of my own. Champaign – apple juice,” he whispered when I lifted a brow in his direction. “And some chilled – ok, frozen, grapes.”

“Frozen grapes?”

Josh nodded, “Oh yes, they are good. Of course, I was only going to cool them but I forgot and they froze. Here,” he picked up one in his fingers and lifted it to my lips. “Try it.” My lips parted and he slipped the grape into my mouth.

I closed my lips on the tip of his finger, grazing it with the tip of my tongue. “Mmmm,” I closed my eyes and groaned.

“Tease,” he whispered and reached for another grape.

While we waited for the tub to fill, we teased each other with the grapes. By the time Josh turned off the water, I was so ready to pull him into bed not slide into a hot bath. He held out his hand to help me in the tub and I told him no. “What?” His smile disappeared.

“I think you are forgetting something,” I slipped my thumb underneath the strap of my bra.

“Come here!” Josh growled as he grabbed hold of my hands and pulled me close. His lips went instinctively to my neck as his hands slipped up my back and unclasped my bra, letting it fall into the pile with the rest of my clothes.

When I was comfortably sitting in the very warm bath, Josh sat next to the tub. “Anna about tonight.” He swirled his fingers through the water a couple times before he looked up at me. “I was an ass.”

“No you weren’t.”

He shook his head, “Yes. Yes I was. I was only thinking about myself. Honey,” he shifted his position. “All I could think of as you were there trying to talk to Hank was, ‘this jackass is ruining my plans, why does she put up with these clowns?’”

I raised a brow at him and he shrugged, “I have no excuse for it. I just wanted tonight to be special, for me to make one of your romantic dreams come true. And it seemed that everyone was trying to stop that.”

I went to say something but he held up his hand. “I know you like to help people; lord knows you’ve helped me a lot. I don’t want you to change that either, it makes you who you are. I know that tomorrow you’ll be out trying to help Hank again and also beating Jordan for not sticking around to tell you tonight.”

I laughed, “You know me so well.”

Josh smiled, “I love you Anna, and I love everything about you. And despite how I act sometimes, I don’t ever want you to change who you are.”

I gave him a sexy smile and stroked his forearm with my wet, soapy finger. “Hey Handsome?”

“Yes Beautiful?”

“How about you get your ‘loving everything about me’ butt in here?”

“Anna, I don’t think I’ll fit.”

I giggled, “I didn’t think that either but you fit just perfectly,” I licked my lips and gave him an innocent look.

“Naughty!” He laughed, but he did remove his clothes and join me in the bath.

Leave Us Alone!

I pulled up behind Josh as he parked Hank’s car in from of a newly renovated 4-plex and waited for him to come over. I watched him get out of the car and he motioned me over as he made his way around to the passenger side of the car.

“What’s wrong?” I asked as I came up to Josh as he opened the passenger door. He motioned in at Hank; he was kind of slumped over in his seat. “What happened? Is he ok?”

Josh nodded, “The alcohol finally hit him, and he’s almost out of it. Here,” he handed me the keys before reaching down and pulling Hank from the car. “Come on man, help me out here!”

We walked Hank to his apartment and dropped him on the couch. There was a little light streaming in from the hallway and I couldn’t help but look around. “What the hell happened here?” I asked Hank. The floor was covered in toys, clothes, objects that shouldn’t be on the floor and there was also glass in the one corner.

Hank laughed, “Heather got mad. She didn’t like the fact that I let you and Jordan know she was back in town or that Jenna was his girl.”

I could feel Josh stiffen as he joined me, I slipped hand in his. “Heather is violent?”

Hank groaned, “Not normally, she just got mad tonight. She came storming in here and just started screaming at me.” He went to sit up but found he couldn’t. “I’m drunk.”

“Yes, you are.” I told him.

“I needed to talk to someone. I don’t know anyone here.” He mumbled.

I glanced at Josh and he shrugged. “I’ll tell you what Hank.” I walked into his apartment and picked up the phone, dialing my cell. Once it rang and the number showed up, I hung up. “I’ll call you tomorrow, to see how you are doing, ok?”

Hank grunted as he turned to face the back of the couch. “I think that was an ok honey.” I turned to Josh. “Are you ready to go now?” I nodded and returned to his side. We closed Hank’s door and locked it, slipping his keys back underneath and headed for Josh’s apartment.

“So promise me no more missions of goodwill tonight?” Josh smiled down at me as we walked hand in hand up the stairs to his apartment.

“I promise,” I told him.

We walked up the last flight of stairs and his smile faded, “What’s wrong?” I asked him.

He pointed towards his door, “I believe that one’s for you.” I looked in the direction he was pointing and cringed.

“Jordy,” I sighed, he was sitting on the floor next to Josh’s door. His jacket was lying on the floor beside him; he was staring at a piece of paper in his hand. When we approached him he looked up and grinned.

“Finally, I was starting to think you weren’t coming back here.” He jumped to his feet.

“Almost wish we didn’t,” I heard Josh mumble as he pulled out his keys to unlock the door. “Jordan what can we do for you?” He glanced over his shoulder at him, he didn’t look that happy.

“I wanted to show you this.” He flipped the piece of paper he was holding around in Josh’s direction. Josh looked at the paper and his frown disappeared.

“That’s her?” He turned around and looked closer at the paper.

“Yes!” Jordan was almost bouncing now. “Isn’t she beautiful?”

Josh nodded, “Yes Jordan she is beautiful.”

I was trying to peek at the paper but at the angle they had it I couldn’t see it. “What are you two looking at?”

The guys looked at me strangely, almost is if they forgot I was there for a moment. “My daughter, Heather gave me a picture.” Jordan threw his arms around me, lifting me off the floor and spinning me around before he placed me down next to Josh again. “I’m so excited Anna, she’s so beautiful and smart and…she looks like me!” He grabbed me again and kissed my cheek before he turned to Josh and hugged him. “Listen we have to get together and talk about Jess possibly playing with Jenna some day soon.” He said as he headed for the stairs.

“Wait! Jordy!” He turned around. “Are you going to tell me what happened today?”

He grinned, “Later babe, I know he wants you to himself for a while. We’ll catch up tomorrow!” He sat on the banister, “Later!” He slid out of sight and then we heard him running down the remainder of the stairs.

I gazed up at Josh in disbelief and he smiled, “Guess he’s a little excited about Jenna. And I believe it went well for him today. Come on honey, let’s go inside.” I nodded and followed him inside.

Once we had hung our jackets up Josh held out his hand to me, “Cell phone?”

“What?” I dug my phone out and looked at it. His hand slipped over mine and he took my phone. Flipping it open, he pressed down on the off button and soon I heard the good bye chime. He then pulled out his phone, showed me and turned it off as well and laid both phones on the kitchen counter before unplugging his land line.

“I don’t want any interruptions tonight,” he told me. “I want to spend what’s left of tonight, showing you how much you mean to me.”

You Said You'd Help

Josh told me he’d be right down, “Honey don’t go anywhere with him. Stay in the store ok?” I told him I would and whispered for him to hurry before he hung up the phone. I was scared, I didn’t know Hank and I didn’t know what he was capable of. I kept telling myself that he wouldn’t do anything while others were around but I didn’t know that for sure. Just stall until Josh gets here; he’ll take care of this. He won’t let anything happen to you.

I thought I was brave but when I turned to see Hank moving towards me, his eyes staring unblinkingly at me, I started to panic all over again. Go get out of here! Go somewhere that people are, get out of this isolated corner. Electronic, go there! I started to make my way down the aisle.

“Anna! Wait!” Hank called after me, he sounded so different than the other times I spoke to him.

I picked up my pace but he must’ve too because I didn’t even make it to the main aisle that leads to electronics when Hank grabbed my arm and spun me around. “Please leave me alone, I didn’t do anything wrong.” I held my hands up in front of me and closed my eyes, expecting the worst.

I heard him sigh and he released my arm. “Anna,” his voice was much softer now but a little off still. “Please? I need someone to talk too. I don’t know anyone in this town but you.”

I didn’t want to feel sorry for him but I did. I knew that he wasn’t close to his girlfriend’s family and Jenna had taken up most of his free time so he didn’t have any friends. Lowering my hands I opened my eyes and looked at him. Saying he looked like crap would be too nice, he looked worst than that. Dressed in the same clothes he was wearing last night, he was rumpled and wrinkled, a couple buttons were undone and his shirt was no long tucked into his pants; it looked like he slept in his clothes. I looked up at his unshaven face and wondered what had happened in the last 24 hours for him. When my eyes connected with his, I gasped a little. “Are you?” I took a step closer to him and the stench was almost overpowering. “You are drunk!”

“Yeah,” He chuckled softly and gave me a half grin. “It’s been a great day for me.”

I was about to say something when I heard footsteps running towards us, I knew it was Josh, who else would it be? Hank and I both turned to see Josh slide around the corner and come to a dead stop. He glanced back and forth between me and Hank before he started to casually walk over to us. If the situation would’ve been any different I would have laughed at this. “Is everything ok?” He asked me when he finally was next to me.

I needed his arms around me so badly at that moment that I almost threw myself at him. “Everything is fine,” I smiled up at him.

But Josh’s icy stare was fixed on Hank. “Hello Hank.”

Looking from Josh to me, Hank took a step back. “I only wanted to talk to you Anna. I wasn’t going to hurt you.”

“I don’t care what you wanted, leave her alone.” Josh snapped at him.

“Josh!”

“No,” Hank interrupted. “It’s ok I’m going to go. Sorry.”

When Hank was out of ear shot I turned to Josh, “What was that all about?”

“What was what about?” He placed his hand on my back and started to lead me sown the aisles. “Anna you were scared on the phone, you wanted me to come here as quickly as possible and when I get here you are talking to him like nothing was wrong?”

“Josh I can’t help it, I’m worried about him. He is just as much an innocent victim as Jordan is. He didn’t look good Josh, he was…” I stopped in my tracks. “Oh god Josh, how did he get here? He’s drunk.” I started to walk/run to the entrance. “I can’t let him drive if he’s drunk Josh!”

Thankfully Josh didn’t try to stop me; he just came along with me. I had a feeling he wasn’t happy about it though. I ran out into the parking lot, hoping I wasn’t too late. “There.” Josh pointed down to the left, where Hank had stopped to pick something up.

I managed to make it over to Hank as he fumbled to get his key into the lock. “Hey!” I said as I slid between him and the car that was parked sideways across two parking stalls. I placed my hand over his and removed his keys, handing them to Josh. When Hank started to protest, I smile and said, “Tell you what, if you can get them from Josh, you can have them.” I watched Hank look Josh over before silently admitting defeat.

His shoulders slumped and he shook his head, “Your boyfriend could easily kill me but with the day I had, that might not be such a bad idea.”

I glanced at Josh; he turned away from me and looked at his watch. Inwardly I groaned. “Hank why don’t you let me call you a ride to take you home? You can shower and get some sleep, what do you say?”

He shrugged his shoulders, “Sure whatever.”

I moved away from Hank and pulled out my phone, dialing my brother’s number at work. After briefly explaining the situation and promising to tell him more tomorrow, I got him to come over and take Hank home. I hung up the phone and walked over to Josh, “Hey Handsome,” I whispered against his back as my arms wrapped around his waist. Josh’s hands covered mine, pulling them apart and away from his body. “Josh?” I stared up at him as he turned around to face me. “Are you mad at me?”

He shook his head and placed my hands on his chest, “I know you have this need to help people Anna, but sometimes I wonder if you know when to stop, when enough is enough.”

Resting my head against his chest, I sighed. “Josh I can’t help it.”

“I know honey.” His hands gripped my hips and he pulled me close. “Just don’t forget that you have to take care of yourself while helping everyone else.” His lips brushed against my jaw as he spoke, sending shivers through my body.

“Josh,” his name came out a little breathless and he peered down at me. “Don’t you want to take care of me?” I gave him a sexy grin as my fingers tugged at his jacket’s zipper.

“You called the cops on me!!” Hank yelled out from behind us. We turned in time to see him try to run. Josh released me and ran after him, stopping him before he went too far. By the time I got over to them Zach and his partner Rick were already out of the car. “I can’t believe you! I only wanted to talk!” Hank looked at Zack, “I didn’t touch her or do anything wrong, I swear!”

Zach made a face and turned to me, “Yeah so how much has be had to drink?”

I shrugged, “You’ll just make sure he gets home?”

“Sis,” Zach shook his head.

I grabbed Zach’s arm and pulled him aside. “Don’t give me that crap about having to take him in because he’s drunk. He’s not doing anything wrong and he just wants to go home. I called you here because you are my brother not because you are a cop.” Zach crossed his arms over his chest and stared down at me. “Don’t look at me like that, you always told me that if I had a friend who needed a ride when they were drunk, you’d help them out. Are you telling me you lied? Or it doesn’t count now that I’m not 18 anymore?”

“How did he get here Anna?”

I shrugged, “I don’t know Zach he was walking when Josh and I stopped him.”

Zach laughed, “You are so full of it and you know it. I’m betting if I run that car, it’ll be his.”

I glared at Zach, “Forget about it, I’ll take him home myself.” I pushed pass him and went over to Josh. “I’m going to take Hank home.”

“The hell you are,” Josh looked at Zach for some assistance but Zach told him that he couldn’t do anything. “Just take him home then! She’s not doing it!”

Hank, who was watching all this, looked confused. “What’s going on?”

“Come on,” I grabbed his arm and started back for his car. “I’m going to take you home since my brother is being a jerk.”

“That cop is your brother?” I nodded. “Oh crap, I thought he was here to arrest me.”

“Anna, you aren’t taking him home!” Josh was standing by my side as I stomped to Hank’s car. “Anna!” He grabbed my arm and spun me towards him. “Just stop will you? I know you are upset right now but please don’t do this.” He sighed, “I’ll take him home and you follow us in my car ok?”

I glanced over my shoulder at Zach who was standing by his car with the door open; Rick was already in the car. “Fine,” I said to Josh.

Josh waited until I was close to his car before he got in Hank’s. I was about to open the door when Zach stopped me, “Don’t be mad sis.”

“Remind me never to ask for your help again,” I threw over my shoulder as I climb into Josh’s car.

Later That Day

It took a while but somehow between Josh and I we were able to convince Jordan that he didn’t miss anything that she didn’t want him to see. Once he finally agreed he wondered off to bed to get some sleep because he was determined to go see Heather and Jenna later that day. ‘Even if I had to camp out on her parents’ doorstep until they come back,” he mumbled as he disappeared into his room.

With Jordan finally down for the night, Josh and I made our way back into my room. “Do you think he’ll be ok?” I asked Josh as he slipped under the covers.

“Yes Anna, I think Jordan will be fine. Once he talks to Heather, he’ll know how to go from there. I just hope she doesn’t try to keep him from his daughter.” We spoke for a while longer about the situation but soon decided that until Jordan talked to Heather, there wasn’t anything else either of us could do for him but be there.

I drifted off to sleep at 7 that morning, hoping to get a solid seven hours of sleep at least, leaving me an hour to grab something to eat and head out for work at 4. But at 11:30, Josh’s cell phone started to ring.

“Noooo!” Josh groaned as he untangled himself from me and reached out from under the blankets to grab his phone. “Hello?” His voice was so rough from the lack of sleep that just listening to him as he spoke was actually turning me on. Oh lord, I groaned inwardly, am I really that easy? I moved the blankets back so I could peek out at him and I smiled, oh yes! I am! I quickly moved to his side and snuggled up with him as he tried to make sense on the phone. “Sure…ummhmm…yeah.” He looked down at me and smiled before kissing my forehead. “What? Oh yeah…ok bye mom.” He hung up, tossed his phone back onto the nightstand and turned his attention to me, attacking me as I laid there so innocently, on my side waiting for him.

“Josh!” I chuckled as the force of his move to hold me ended up turning me onto my back. He chuckled as well but was too preoccupied nibbling and kissing my neck to reply. When I told him that felt good, he told me that was the idea. “Are you trying to seduce me Coach Baker?” I laughed.

Josh froze and moved back from me, “Anna don’t.”

The smile fades from my face, “Don’t what Josh?”

“Please don’t call me ‘Coach’, that’s what the kids call me and hearing you say it when I’m…I’m…” he groaned. “It just doesn’t sit well with me.” He moved to lie down next to me again.

Turning onto my side, I looked up at him. “I’m sorry honey; I didn’t realize it was a bad thing to call you.”

“It’s not a bad thing Anna; it’s just that hearing you say it when I want to make love to you.” He sighed, “I just want to keep you separate from my work and being called ‘Coach’ is a work thing.”

“So I can’t visit you at work sometime?”

Josh smiled, “You can visit me at work anytime you like.”

“But I can’t call you ‘Coach’?”

“Not when I’m trying to seduce you.”

“Oh,” I frowned.

He was back to frowning again, “How do I explain this?” He asked as he ran a hand through his hair. “Ok. It’s like this; I associate being called ‘Coach’ to my job with kids right?” I nodded. “I don’t want you to be calling me ‘Coach’ when we are making love because I don’t want to be in the middle of class and hear someone call me ‘Coach’ and immediately think about our last love making session. Anna honey,” Josh rolled onto his back, pulling me with him. “Thinking about you makes me very horny; I don’t want everyone at school to see that.”

“Oh!” I grinned, “So you don’t want the kids to be scared when you suddenly get hard when they just want to know if they can hang out and play some ball?”

He groaned, “That’s just wrong!”

I laughed, “I know but you love me anyway.”

Josh nipped at my shoulder, “Yes I do.”

We ended up not making love, we talked for a while and then fell back to sleep. Waking only moments before my alarm clock went off at 3. Josh stuck around the house while I got ready and then he drove me to work, so he’d have an excuse to see me later.

I tried to get into work but every time I turned around, I thought I saw Hank and I didn’t know how to react. I still couldn’t believe that I didn’t realize that Jenna was Jordan’s daughter; I was still kicking myself for not realizing it too.

It was a slow night, like most Sunday nights were. Thankfully we closed at 9 instead of ten. Around 8:30 I was so ready to go home, I had just gotten back to my department after going to find the manager to see if I could go home, they said yes so I went into the back and grabbed my stuff. As I swiped my name badge through the time machine, I pulled out my cell and dialed Josh’s number to tell him I was off early.

“Hello?” Josh’s voice came over the phone and I smiled. I felt the same rush of energy just hearing his voice as I did every time I saw him.

“Hey Handsome,” I said as I pushed through the doors to go onto the main floor. “Word has it that this chick is done work for the night and is available for whatever naughty things you have in mind.”

Josh laughed, “Is that so?”

“Oh yes,” I smiled as I made my way through layaway and started to walk by the infants department. “I’m so ready for you it…” I stopped dead in my tracks as I glanced to my right, into the department.

“So ready it what?” Josh asked.

“I…umm…” I stared into my department, shocked and not sure what to do.

“Anna? Honey what’s wrong?”

Sudden movement from the department caused me to panic. “Josh, please come quickly Hank is here.”

Same Old Questions, Where Are The Answers?

The need to use the bathroom was the reason I woke up from my sleep. It was the reason I crawled out of my nice warm bed. But needing to use the bathroom wasn’t the reason I left my incredibly handsome boyfriend sleeping soundly all by his lonesome.

It was almost 5 in the morning, the sun was still no where close to rising but by the look of the light coming from the kitchen, someone was up. I made my way to the kitchen but I wasn’t all that surprised to see Jordan sitting at the table. I stood there and watched him for a while, he had the picture I mentioned earlier, the one I used when I tried to tell him what Jenna looked like, in his left hand and he was picking through the rest of the pictures. “Hey Jordy,” I moved further into the room.

Jordan looked up and me and sighed, “I keep looking for a picture that looks similar to this one, to bring to you and find out if it’s any closer to what she looks like.” He shook his head sadly, “I don’t even have a picture of her.”

“I’m so sorry Jordan,” I pulled a chair up to his and sat down. “I wish I had a picture to show you. No,” I shook my head, “I wish I figured it out sooner. You know the day we went ‘shopping’ with Nick?” Jordan nodded, “Well Hank was there with Jenna, that’s where I was when you guys paged me.”

Jordan pushed back his chair and stared at me. “I was that close? She was only a few feet away from me?” It was my turn to nod, “Argh! I probably passed them in one of the aisles and not even realized it. Anna,” he grabbed hold of my shoulders, stood up and pulled me out of my chair. “You have no idea how much this sucks.”

I didn’t know what to say to him, he was right I didn’t know. Unlike Josh, I wouldn’t be able to tell him my own struggles to see my child. So I did the only thing I could do, I hugged him and told him I would do anything I could to help him see his daughter.

We stood like that for a while, locked in the hug that I initiated and he returned. It was a little weird at first, only because with all the tension that’s been floating around lately, Jordan and I haven’t really just stopped to take the time to be friends. It wasn’t until I started to giggle at the fact that I had found it a little weird to hug him at first, that Jordan pulled back from me. “What?” He asked with his eyebrow raised.

I shook my head, still giggling. “I love you Jordy,” I stretched up and kissed his cheek.

Jordan rolled his eyes, “Yeah, I love you too Babe.”

And then it was like old times again, he motioned towards the living room and I followed him there. We were sitting side-by-side on the couch, he had pulled the foot stool close enough to the couch so that I could rest my feet on it too. “So,” Jordan threw his arm around my shoulders. “What can you tell me about Jenna? Does she talk? Do funny things? I know I probably asked this before but humor me Anna.”

I smiled, “I don’t mind telling you again.” I told him everything I could remember about Jenna, any little noises she made while I was talking to Hank, the looks she gave me, the smiles and giggles and most importantly how she held onto my finger and tried to shove her cookie into my mouth.

“That’s my girl!” Jordan beamed.

We talked for a little while longer about Jenna before we heard one of the bedroom doors open. We both stopped talking and turned to look over the back of the couch to see if someone was coming out towards the living room. It was like we were little kids again and at a sleepover where we never did much sleeping. I glanced at Jordan when the footsteps started to come our way, “Uh-oh! We’re in trouble now!” I whispered.

Jordan looked at me and just started to laugh, “That’s the same expression you had on your face the time you got caught digging into your birthday cake when we were 7!”

I batted at him, “Shhhhhh!”

The footsteps had stopped now and slowly we both looked back over the couch. “Hey Josh,” we both said at the same time and then we started to laugh even harder.

Josh pushed off the wall and made his way over to us, “What’s so funny?”

Between the laughter Jordan cried out, “Anna got caught eating cake!” I gave him a funny look and he damn near fell off the couch because he was laughing so hard.

“What is that about?” Josh asked me.

I had sobered up a little, I wasn’t laughing as much. “I don’t know, I think someone is tired. Jordy?” I grabbed him by the shoulders and tried to sit him back against the couch again but he came towards me, throwing his arms around my shoulders and then I realized he wasn’t laughing anymore.

“Why didn’t she tell me Anna? How much does a person have to hate to keep a child from their father?” Jordan moved back to look into my eyes. “I loved her Anna, you know I did. I still do. Was I too busy planning our future together to see that she had grown to hate me? Did I miss some sign?”

Misery Loves Company

I wasn’t in my room long before there was a knock at my door. He needs my advice after all, I thought as I shot up in bed. “Come in!” The smile I had on my face faded when I saw who was at the door.

“Can I talk to you for a minute?”

“Sure,” I replied as I shrugged my shoulders and fell back against my bed.

“Huh, I know I’m not the one you wanted to be coming to talk to you right now but you are my friend too. Or did you forget that?”

I admittedly felt like crap. “I’m sorry Nick,” I sat up and patted the empty space beside me. When he was comfortably sitting down, I turned to him. “I’m just not used to you wanting to talk about anything, you always talk to Amy, which you should.” I sighed. “You just never need my friendship as much as Jordan has.”

He nodded, “I know but tonight I do.”

“So what’s on your mind? And why can’t you talk to Amy? Is everything ok between you two?” I was suddenly very worried, I didn’t know if I could handle him telling me that they were having problems.

Nick leaned his head back against the wall and looked at me. “Amy and I are doing fine. She was tired so she went to lie down in the guest room, was that ok?” I nodded. “Good, I think we’ll just stay here tonight because I know she won’t want to wake up when I I’m ready to go.”

Again, I nodded. “It’s ok Nick. So tell me what’s on your mind.”

He took a moment to get his thoughts together, or at least that’s what it seemed like he was doing. Finally he spoke, “You know this thing with Jordan tonight has totally thrown me off kilter.”

“What do you mean?”

“He’s not supposed to be a father.”

I looked at him in disbelief, “What?”

“I’m the one who’s supposed to be a father, not him.”

“Nick, you are going to be a father. Amy is pregnant.”

“I know!” He completely turned to face me, “Listen out of my brothers and me, I’m the only one in a stable relationship and honestly, I’m the only one who wants to be a father. But now that we find out that Jordan has a daughter, it’s like my whole existence is null and void. He’s stolen the one thing that set me part from him. Jordy a father?” Nick shook his head and laughed, “It’s like I’ve entered the Twilight Zone!”

I was shocked at what Nick was saying; I’ve never heard him ever get on like this, like he was jealous of Jordan. “So you realize how silly you sound right now?”

Nick rolled his eyes, “Of course you would think that, you’ve always been more of Jordan’s friend than mine.”

“Nicholas! That is so not true!”

“Oh whatever!” Nick jumped off the bed, “The only time I ever see you is when I come over to see Jordan. Do you have any idea when the last time we spent time together?”

I shook my head, “No I don’t know Nick. And besides what does this have to do with anything?”

“When Amy and I broke up for those five horrible months when we were 17, that was the last time you had time for me!” Nick must have realized that he was almost yelling, for the next words he said were much lower. “What do I have to do for you to be my friend Anna? Be a whiny loser like my brother?”

“Nick!” I grabbed his arm, “First off, Jordan isn’t a whiny loser and you know it! Secondly, you know damn well that I’ve backed off from being around you as much as I used to because that’s what Amy wanted! And you know why too! So don’t get there and pretend that you are being treated unfairly by me. Now, do you really want to talk about something or do you just want to yell at me because you are jealous that Jordan has a one year old daughter that he didn’t even know about until tonight!”

Nick stood there staring at me, his mouth opened as if he had something to say but he closed it again.

“Nick do you realize how silly you being jealous of Jordan is? You know Amy is pregnant, you get to be there for every single moment of your baby’s life; Jordan has missed out on so much of Jenna’s life. He didn’t have the chance to see her being born, to hear her first words, to see her crawl or start to walk. He missed all the milestones, he missed so much time that he can never get back. Are you really jealous of that?”

He shook his head, “No, I’m not.”

“I know that you have always done everything first, and you know what? That hasn’t changed. Sure you may not have given your parents their first grandchild but you still have so many firsts to experience.”

“Why is it that talking to you makes me feel guilty and then happy again?”

I laughed, “Because I’m just that good of a friend.”

“Come here,” Nick grabbed my hands and pulled me into his arms. “Hey, maybe I can’t give my parents their first granddaughter, but maybe a grandson?”

I looked up at him, “Is Amy having a boy?”

He shrugged, “I don’t know. Ahhh, it doesn’t matter either. I’m going to be a dad and I can’t wait!”

“Good!” I smiled. “But in the meantime, you get to be an uncle.”

Nick’s eyes went wide, “I never thought I would be one of those,” he whispered.

We must have talked for at least another hour about Jordan’s situation, wondering if Heather would let him see Jenna, or if she would try to keep her from him. We both agreed that we hoped she didn’t try to stop him; Jordan didn’t take no very well.

It was almost 1 by the time Nick decided that he was going to turn in, we said good night and he gave me another hug as he thanked me for being there for him. After he disappeared into the spare room, I was so tempted to head out to the living room and see what Josh and Jordan were talking about. What I really wanted was to be a part of the conversation. Just like Nick was jealous that Jordan was a father before him, I was jealous that Jordan preferred to talk to Josh about this than me. I understood why, even more since I told Nick about all the things that Jordan missed out on. Even though Josh knew about Jess, he still missed out on most of the moments of his life, little moments that mattered the most.

I resisted going down the hall to interrupt, instead I changed into my pjs and crawled back into bed.

The sound of my bedroom door being slowly pushed open woke me from my sleep two hours later. Josh closed the door behind him and quietly made his way over to my bed. I watched him as he tugged off his shirt and undid his pants to slip them off. He leaned down and grasped the end of my blankets, lifting them so he could slip under them.

I was about to let him know that I was awake when he slipped his arms around me pulling me back against his body. “Anna?” His voice was but a whisper in my ear and it made me shiver.

“Yes Josh?”

He kissed the back of my neck and then my shoulder, “I’m glad you are awake.”

Half turning towards him, I raised a brow, which he couldn’t see. “Is everything ok?”

“Yes,” he nodded. “Jordan had a lot of questions and I found myself telling him the whole story with my own fight to see my son. It’s the first time I actually felt like my situation was helping someone.”

I kissed his forearm which was lying loosely across my throat. “I’m glad you and Jordan finally had a chance to talk.”

“He’s not as bad as I thought he would be.” Josh moved his arm that was by my neck, out from under me and he pushed himself up on his elbow. “You know, we even talked about us.”

“Oh? What did he say?”

“He apologized for being a jerk, told me he was only trying to protect you. He also told me that he does love you but no where close to the way I seem to love you.” Josh kissed my forehead, “He told me that you are his best friend and without you, he doesn’t think he’d be where he is today.”

Sadly I laughed at that, “No he would be none the wiser that he fathered a child.”

“Anna, Jordan is nervous but excited about the fact that he has a daughter. He was a little worried about you when we first started to talk and when we were done he asked me to say something to you.”

I waited but Josh didn’t continue. “What? He wanted you to think of something to say on your own?”

“No,” Josh chuckled. “He wanted me to say, “Babe you’re awesome, you always know just what I need before I do. Thanks for everything’.”

I shook my head. “Is it silly that I feel like crying right now?”

Josh crawled over me and pulled me into his arms, “Nope it’s not silly.”

I pressed my face against Josh’s chest, laughing and crying as he held me tight.