Friday, August 22, 2008

Setting Up Time To Talk

I was driving along, thinking about what was on the agenda for Josh and my second meeting with the kids, when I heard something that pulled me out of my trance. Glancing in the rear view mirror, I couldn’t help but chuckle. Sitting comfortably in her car seat, Jenna held her Dora doll in her tiny hands and, with gutso that would put her daddy to shame, she ‘sang’ her little heart out. It as the cutest thing I ever saw, even if you couldn’t understand a word she was singing.

“We’re almost at the high school,” I told her. “You know, your daddy and I went to this high school when we were younger; we had such great times too.” As I took a walk down memory lane, Jenna stopped singing and seemed to be hanging on every word I said. When I would stop, she gave me a questioning look. When I chuckled, she laughed as if she was copying me.

We were laughing about the time Jordan went to school dressed and acting like a woman for Halloween, when I turned into the parking lot of the drama building. “Oh perfect,” I exclaimed when I saw who was waiting for us.

My door flew open without me even touching it. “I’m so glad you are here!”

“I’m happy to see you too,” I smiled and slipped my hand into his out stretched one.

Motioning towards the backseat, he grinned. “I see you have precious cargo in the back. I bet Jordan is excited to have her…” he trailed off, a frown forming on his handsome face. “Wait, I thought Mike said Jordan only had her on the weekends? Did something change?”

Shaking my head, I told Eric that Jenna being with me was a surprise to me and to Jordan. “Hank’s grandmother is dying and Heather thought it would be a good time for Jordan to get more ‘daddy’ time with Jenna.” I went on to explain that she couldn’t get a hold of Jordan at work, so she asked me to help her out.

“Need a hand?” He asked as I swung Jenna’s bag and then mine onto my shoulder. When I nodded, Eric relieved me of the bags and told me to see to Jenna. “What do you have in here?”

Glancing over my shoulder, I shrugged, “Hopefully everything I’ll need for the show. You know, Jordan and I were up late last night talking tossing some ideas back and forth. It was great, having him listen to my ideas and share his own with me. I don’t think I’ve ever had a boyfriend who matched me as well as Jordan does – mentally and physically.”

Eric was nodding when I turned with Jenna in my arms. “I know exactly what you mean Anna.”

“Mike?”

His eyes lit up at the mention of Mike’s name. “Mike may drive me insane sometimes – being so stubborn and everything – but when he relaxes…”

It was my turn to nod knowingly. “Must be a Pollett trait, Jordy’s the same way.” Reaching for the door handle, I paused to look up at Eric. “But I wouldn’t trade him for any of my exs.”

“Speaking of exs…” Eric motioned towards the closed door. “How is it working with Josh?”

With a sigh, I told him that it will be a lot better when I talk to him. “He thinks he still loves me, and he seems to think grabbing and kissing me will change my mind.” I snorted. “I’m happy with Jordan, really happy.”

“That’s wonderful.”

Wide eyed, I turned to see Josh leaning out the other door. Figures, I thought. “Hey Josh,” I flashed him my best smile. “How are you doing today?”

“Super.”

“Great,” I held my smile. “We,” I motioned between Eric and I. “Are cold but ready to get to work.” Without waiting for him to say anything else, I pulled open my side of the double doors and walked through.

The moment I put Jenna down, she took off for the stage with her arm outstretched, pointing at something. Walking over to her, I asked what she was pointing at. It wasn’t until I crouched down to her level that I saw what she saw – a drawing of her favourite cartoon character, the only, the only, Dora the Explorer.

“Wow,” I gasped as my eyes met hers. “It’s Dora!” She held up her doll for me to see. “Yeah,” I tapped Dora on the nose. “Want to go see her?” She nodded and held out her arms to me.

Jenna was babbling about Dora while she went back and forth from the drawing to her doll when I noticed that the room was awfully quiet. And it seemed a little chillier. With a sigh, I told Jenna we had to go back and sit down. “There are going to be lots of kids in here in a few minutes. Cassie and Lindsay will be here.”

I walked up to the cold front with Jenna in my arms. “Josh, I have some stuff I would like to go over with you before the kids show up.” Handing Jenna to Eric, I asked him to remove her jacket and settle her down with the snack Heather packed in her bag. “This way.” I led Josh off to the far chairs, away from Eric and Jenna.

“What is he doing here?” Josh asked the moment we were out of earshot. “Making this a family production?”

Shaking my head, I just laughed, “I guess you could say that seeing my niece, Cassie, thought of this show. My other niece, Lindsay, is working on the advertising side of things and I’m –”

“You want his dad to help with the set and now you have…” he motioned towards Eric. “What’s he doing here?”

“Josh, I don’t want John to help; John is helping, he’ll be here for Friday’s meeting to see what the kids have for ideas.”

“No,” Josh shook his head. “I already asked dad to help and he’s going to help the kids – not his father.”

“Oh for the love of God!” I wanted to shake him. “Well, I guess they’ll have to work together.”

“Anna –”

“Josh would you stop trying to pick a fight with me? Do you really think acting this way is going to help you at all? You’re supposed to be the professional one, this is where you work.”

“Don’t tell me how to act.”

“Well stop acting like a baby!”

Thankfully the kids started to drift in before it could turn into an elementary school playground fight. Before I left him to start the meeting, I informed him that Eric was there because his radio station was going to do ads for us. “I thought it would be nice if the kids had the chance to work with an accomplished ad guy.”

Josh actually agreed with me on that one.

“Oh!” I smiled at him. “That talk you wanted to have?”

“Yeah?” His whole face lit up. “What about it?”

“You’ll get it.”

“Really? When?”

“Well…” I shrugged. “I don’t know, it was going to be today but now that I have Jenna, it’ll have to be –”

“Tomorrow?” He jumped in. “After school? In my office?” Before I could reply, he changed his mind. “No, not my office. A restaurant….” He thought for a moment. “Oh! The Grillhouse! I’m sure I can get a reservation, no problem.”

I hesitated. The Grillhouse was the first place we went when we got back together. It was where he told me that he was my mysterious caller. I thought about it, did it really matter where we had the talk? If I told him ‘no’, would be insist on something more imitate? I wanted the talk over with, and I wanted him in a good mood when it was all said and done, would letting him have the restaurant be that big of a deal?


“Ok.” I gave in. “See if you can get the Grillhouse Josh.”

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Unexpected

My talk with Josh didn’t go the way I wanted. In fact, it didn’t happen at all. It wasn’t because I chickened out nor was it because he got ticked and left. No, it didn’t happen because forces beyond my control took matters out of my hands.

Forces in the form of my boyfriend’s ex girlfriend.

It was midafternoon, Linda and I were going through the various carts of recovery that we picked up from customer service moments before. As we sorted through the carts, separating it out into aisles, Linda told me about the issues she was having with the woman who looked after her youngest son.

“Apparently, Peter has developed a ‘behaviour’ issue; she told me so in the many letters she has sent home with him.” With a frustrated groan, Linda looked at me helplessly. “I want to take him out of there but I can’t really afford to put him in anywhere else – child care is so expensive. If he was a year older, he could go to preschool and I wouldn’t have to worry about it so much.”

“What about programs like, ‘Now I’m Three’ and ‘Kiddies Korner’? Doesn’t he qualify to go to those?”

Linda nodded. “But it’s not all day, every day. I would’ve –” Her face fell – a sign that she was thinking about her husband. I reached out to place my hand on her shoulder. “No,” she shook her head. “It’s ok, I’m ok but I miss him so much. The boys miss him so much.” Despite saying she was ok, she started to tear up. “I can’t do it myself.”

“Of course you can!” I dropped the sippy cup I was holding. “It may not be easy but you can totally do this, you have been doing this since Randy’s death.” She started to protest. “Come on Linda, I saw the boys, they seemed really happy – they wouldn’t be, if you weren’t doing a great job.”

“Yeah, I guess so.” She turned her attention back to the carts. “But…”

“What?”

“Concern for the boys isn’t the only reason I miss Randy.” With a glance around, she told me that she missed him. “Both of our families keep telling me that it would be ok if I started to date again but…” She shrugged. “Do you have any idea how much it sucks to even think about dating? I had the man of my dreams, I have my boys. I thought I was over with the whole dating scene.”

“Linda, if you don’t want to date, you don’t have too. I mean, it’s only been three months since it happened. Don’t rush into dating or anything else until you are ready. You have to think about what you want and what’s good for the boys.”

“Yeah.” She flashed me a smile. “But I could use a little attention, you know what I mean?”

“Anna parked call on 886. Anna, from Infants, parked call on 886.”

“Hold that thought.”

As I made my way through the department, towards the phone, I wondered who could possibly be calling me at work. Picking up the phone, I immediately heard crying. “Hello?” I couldn’t help the worried feeling that came over me.

“Anna, hi, it’s – Jenna! Mommy said no!”

“Heather?” I frowned. “What’s going on? Why’s Jenna crying?”

Before Heather could reply, I heard Hank’s voice in the background. “Heather, what did I do with my – nevermind, I got it. Who are you talking too? Did you get hold of Jordan yet?”

“Jordan?” I questioned. “Why do you need to talk to him?”

“Listen Anna, I don’t have much time, we got a call a half hour ago that Hank’s grandmother is in the hospital, they don’t think she’ll make it through the night. Hank, obviously wants to go see her but he doesn’t think that it’s the right place for Jenna to be. My parents said they would watch her but I thought that Jordan, seeing he is her father, would like the chance to –”

“Yes!” I exclaimed. “Oh my God! Jordan will love to spend more time with Jenna!”

She chuckled. “You would too by the sounds of it.”

I grinned. “Heather, knowing how happy it’ll make Jordan, how could I not be excited about it?” I asked her when she would be dropping Jenna off to him.

“That’s the thing,” she sighed. “I’ve been calling him all day at work but they keep telling me that he’s busy or out. I told them to tell him that I really needed to talk to him but I still haven’t heard back; Hank wants to leave as soon as possible.”

“Well…” I glanced at my watch. “I have an hour before I can go but…” It wasn’t all that busy and Linda was there. “I’m sure; I can leave now, if you want to drop her off here on your way out of town.”

“I was hoping you would say that.” Heather told Jenna that she was going to spend some time with me while her daddy was still working. “She’s excited,” she told me when she spoke again. “We’ll see you in a half hour?”

As soon as I hung up the phone, I called the duty manager and explained the situation. Thankfully it didn’t take much convincing to get them to understand why it was important for me to leave early for Jenna.

After I told Linda what was going on, I made my way to Layaway to use that phone to call outside of the store. Like Heather, when I called the garage, I was told that Jordan was super busy. “I’ll tell him you called Anna but he’s elbows deep into the work order on a couple cop cars – he probably won’t take a break for another hour or so.”

Knowing Jordan the way I do, I knew that he wouldn’t stop until he finished the job, unless it was an emergency, which this wasn’t, not really. Doing the math in my head, I realized that by the time Jordan would possibly be free, I would be in the middle of meeting with the kids about the play. “Ok, when he comes up for air, tell him that I have a big surprise for him when he gets home.”

“Ohhhho!” Tony chuckled. “Is our boy getting lucky tonight?”

Rolling my eyes, I laughed and sarcastically replied, “Yes, that’s exactly what it is.”

It wasn’t until I headed into the back, after hanging up with Tony, that I realized I would have Jenna, so I couldn’t really talk to Josh about his actions. “Great,” I sighed. “Not only do I have to put this off but he’ll probably be a jerk because I have Jenna.”

When I pulled out of the parking lot, with Jenna securely snapped into the car seat in the back, just over an hour later, I was dreading seeing Josh but excited about seeing Jordan.

Glancing in the rear view mirror, I told Jenna that we would see daddy in a couple hours. “But first, we get to visit with Cassie and Lindsay.”


Jenna looked up with a crooked grin, one I’ve seen on Jordan so many times, it was so adorable.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Lunch Viewing

Cheryl told me she’d see me in the lunchroom before she disappeared again. A minute later, I finished with the order and as I stood up, I called out to Linda. “I’m going for lunch.” She came around the corner as I dropped my gun and printer on the horseshoe counter.

“No problem,” she told me after I gave her a couple things I wished for her to do while I was on lunch. “Enjoy,” she called after me.

I planned on it. I had leftover pork steak, mang and potato in my lunch.

But as we all know, sometimes life has other plans for you.

I was walking along by the car/booster seat displays, making a list in my head of the seats I would need to stock when I got back from lunch when I came up solid against someone.

Lifting my head, I opened my mouth to apologize for not watching where I was going but that’s not what came out of me at all.

“What are you doing here?”

Before the words were out of my mouth, his hands curled around my hips. “Hey,” he smiled as he tugged me towards his hard body. “You look good enough to eat.” Lowering his head, he buried his face in the crook of my neck.

“Jordy!” I couldn’t help but chuckle as he nibbled. “Not here.”

“No?” He lifted his head, his lips brushing against my ear. “Wanna go in the backroom and make out?”

Behind me, I heard Linda laugh. When Jordan lifted his head further, she came over to us. “I take it you are Jordan?” She glanced at me and then said, “Well you better be him or Anna’s got some explaining to do!”

Chuckling, Jordan slipped a hand from around me to take Linda’s outstretched hand. “Yes, I’m Jordan and you must be Linda – Anna never stops talking about you and Sara – she thinks you two hung the moon.”

Linda’s cheeks took on a bright shade of red. Through her embarrassed stammering, she told us that she had work to do. “It was nice meeting you Jordan.” As she turned away she told Jordan that she had never seen me as happy as I have been since we started to date. “Enjoy your lunch Anna,” she threw over her shoulder.

“Lunch?” Jordan raised a brow as he slid his hand up and down my back. “Is it my lucky day?”

“No,” I shook my head, taking his hand in mine, I led him out of the department. “It’s my lucky day, you never get have lunch the same time as me. How did I get so lucky?”

He grinned. “You told me you loved me?”

“Yeah,” I flashed him a grin of my own. “I admitted to being crazy.”

“Ha!” His hand tightened around mine but he didn’t say anything else, he just smiled.

When we got to the doors leading into the back, I told him that I would just be a minute, “The girls are waiting for me, I have to tell them that I can’t join them for lunch.”

He kissed my cheek. “Hurry Babe.”

In the lunch room the girls were disappointed when I told them that I couldn’t have lunch with them, until I told them that Jordan was the reason I was skipping. “Oh,” Cheryl stood up, saying she was done lunch.

“No way,” I laughed. “You guys leave him alone!”

“We just want to meet him.” She disappeared out the door, followed closely by Jamie. “Take your time!”

“Yeah, right!” I hurried into the locker room to grab my phone and wallet.

“It’s so nice to finally meet you,” I heard Cheryl say as I neared the double swinging doors. “You and your daughter are all Anna ever talks about –”

“Yes,” Jamie cut in with a chuckle. “All she ever talks about. I can’t tell you how many times we’ve heard the story of how you and Anna started dating.”

It was Cheryl’s turn to cut in. “We can’t tell you how happy we were to hear – I don’t think I’ve ever seen Anna as happy as she been in the last couple month.” Peeking through the small window, I saw Cheryl reach out and squeeze Jordan’s shoulder. “You have been so good for her.”

Jordan shook his head as he shrugged her hand off. “It has nothing to do with me.” They started to protest but he wouldn’t hear it. “The Anna I’ve known all my life has always been happy – when she stops trying to be what everyone wants her to be, that is.” He went on to tell them that I was his best friend and it was the best day of his life when he overheard me talking out my feelings with Jenna. “Anna made me the happiest man in the world that day.”

No one had a chance to make a comment about his statement; I came out from the back. “Ready?” He asked me as he held out his hand for mine. Slipping my hand into his, I told the girls I would see them in an hour.

****

“Well, that was a waste of time.” Jordan helped me up into the passenger seat of his truck. “I was hoping, when Wanda called to let me know she had a new house to show us, that it would be something to look forward to but –” He shook his head. “I think that one the worst out of them all so far.”

Agreeing, I let out a huge sigh.

“Oh don’t worry Babe, we’ll find something. Something great, I just know it.”

“Yeah,” I flashed him a weary smile. “But if the sale of your house goes through first –“

“Then we won’t have to worry about where the money comes from,” he joked.

“Not funny,” I told him. “Seriously. What will you do if the sale of your house goes through before we find something?”

He shrugged, closing my door before rushing around to his side. When he was seated comfortably, he told me that he hadn’t thought that far ahead. “Mom told me I could stay there but…” he screwed up his face. “I really don’t want to go back there – moving home just isn’t in my plans – even if it’s only temporarily.”

“You could –“

Jordan raised a brow. “Don’t you think there are enough people living at your brother’s house?”

Lowering my head, I told him I just thought that it would be a better option than going home. “We would be together.”

“Babe, you know I would love to say yes to that but I don’t think I could bring myself to ask your brother if I could stay there.”

“But he wouldn’t mind,” I insisted. “Jordy you know Zach would do anything he could to help us out.”

“I know.” He slipped his key into the ignition. “But, you know me, I don’t –“

“Want to owe anyone,” I finished for him.

He nodded. “I know you don’t understand it Babe but ­–”

“You’ve been on your own for so long.”

He laughed. “You think you know everything, don’t you Sweetheart.”

“Yes,” I grinned confidently. “That’s the best thing about dating your best friend -“

“There isn’t much we don’t know about each other?” He cut in, smiling. “See? I can do it too Babe.”

Shaking my head slightly, I gazed at him. “You know, despite you being a pain in the ass - most of the time - I can’t help loving you.”

His reply? “I can’t help loving you too Babe.”

****

Later that night, as we spooned after making love, Jordan asked me to turn towards him. “I’ve been thinking.” He said as I moved.

“Oh?” I glanced towards the window. “It’s going to storm really bad now,” I joked.

“Ha, ha!” He pulled me into his arms once again. “I’ve been thinking about this since yesterday and ­–“

“You’ve been thinking about holding me?”

“Well…yeah….” He kissed my forehead. “But that’s not the thought I was talking about…”

Raising a brow, I stared up at him. “What were you thinking?”

“I think…” he took a deep breath. “I know you say you don’t need too, but I think you should have that conversation with Josh.”

“What?” I pushed away from him. “No, I don’t have anything to say to him.”

“Anna…”

“No Jordan,” I sat up. “You know he doesn’t want to have a real conversation, he just wants to tell me that he believes he loves me still and that he would stop at nothing until we are back together and no! I don’t want that at all!”

“Calm down,” he said softly as he sat up. “I know you don’t want him back but Babe, if you leave this, he’ll make your time on the show, hell.” He stroked my arm gently. “I don’t want anything to upset you right now.”

I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t expect him to want me to talk to Josh at all. “I – I…” I stammered.

“You don’t have too Anna but I think it would be good for you if you deal with him now.”

I watched him as he fell back against his mattress. “What if I don’t want to talk to him at all?”

“Then you don’t have too,” he smiled at me. “It was just a suggestion Babe.”

“Ok.” I moved to my favourite position – curled up next to him. “I’ll think about it.”

I didn’t want to do it but I knew Jordan had a point; I had to stop Josh from trying to go any further with his little ‘I still love you’ admission. “Jordy?”

“Hmm?” He turned his head my way but his eyes remained closed. “What is it Anna?”

“I’ll do it. I’ll go see Josh tomorrow to deal with this.”

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Working

“How did it go?” Linda asked me when I joined her bright and early Tuesday morning.

“Hmm?” I frowned; I was still half asleep despite being up for almost two hours already. “How did what go?” Before I left work the day before, I had filled Linda in on what had happened over the weekend with Jordan and I had told her about having to work with Josh for Cassie’s school show.

“The house hunting!” She exclaimed with a laugh. “Did you find what you were looking for?”

I sighed. “No.”

After a couple hours of house hunting, Jordan, my nieces and I crawled up into Jordan’s truck without having found something even close to what we were looking for.

“That last one was nice,” Cassie attempted but when I glanced back at her, she shrugged. “I’m just trying to help.”

“No worries,” Jordan sighed, then with a tired smile on his face; he turned to me and said, “Do you know what I feel like right now?”

Shaking my head, I told him I hadn’t a clue. “But,” I gave him a hopeful look. “Going home sounds great if you ask me.”

He nodded thoughtfully. “Yes, going home sounds great but –”

We waited but he didn’t finish his statement, so I asked him.

“I feel like having a BBQ.”

“A BBQ?” I raised a brow. “Jordan it’s the middle of winter.” I motioned outside the windshield to the snow covered grounds. “There’s snow everywhere and it’s below 0 – it’s too cold.”

“Nonsense,” he righted himself in his seat and started his truck. “It’s never too cold to BBQ and that’s what I feel like having.” Slipping the truck into drive, he merged into traffic while informing me that we would have to stop at the store to pick up some steaks and wieners. “Oh,” he grinned at me. “Can you make that….” He snapped his fingers as if the words were on the tip of his tongue and that would make them jump out of his mouth. “You know, the stuff with the peppers, onions –”

“Mang,” Cassie piped up. “That’s what we call it Uncle Jordy.”

“Ahhh, yes,” he looked at me. “What do you say?”

I was too tired to really argue with him and just mentioning BBQ was making my tummy growl. “Sounds good Jordy.”

“You didn’t find anything?” Linda sounded just as disappointed as I was the night before. “Nothing at all?”

“Nothing at all.” I confirmed. “We must’ve looked at five or six houses but they all were lacking.” I shrugged. “I don’t know, am I being too picky? Wanting a house that ‘speaks’ to me? One that is everything I want – one that I can see Jordan and I raising a family in.”

“Of course not,” she reassured me. “It’s only natural. I’m sure that you’ll find it.”

“I hope so, Jordan already put his house on the market and there’s been a few serious inquires just yesterday alone!”

As we talked in detail about the houses Jordan and I looked at the day before, Linda and I walked the department to see if there was anything that needed our immediate attention. There was nothing – as usual – Sara had worked the night before.

“Sara’s awesome,” Linda exclaimed as we returned to the horseshoe. “I love coming in after she has worked.” I agreed completely with Linda, Sara was wonderful; I never had anything to worry about when she was working.

“Have you talked to her lately?”

“Briefly, this morning, she seemed to be in a bug hurry to leave though.”

“Running off to see Tanner was she?” Linda chuckled. “She’s so cute when she gushes about him, I just wish they would get together already – he seems like a nice boy.”

I just had time to nod before a customer came up to us and that started the continuous stream of customers for the next couple hours. I was so wrapped up in my work that I was really surprised when Cheryl, the department manager of Electronics, showed up at my side. “It’s lunchtime Anna.”

Since I became department manager, Cheryl, Jamie (Pets department manager) and I have always had lunch together since we all had the same scheduled lunchtime. It was nice because it gave me a chance to make a few new ‘friends’ and catch up on the gossip around work and town.

“Just give me a minute; I need to finish ordering this for a customer.”

Cheryl told me she’d see me in the lunchroom before she disappeared again. A minute later, I finished with the order and as I stood up, I called out to Linda. “I’m going for lunch.” She came around the corner as I dropped my gun and printer on the horseshoe counter.

“No problem,” she told me after I gave her a couple things I wished for her to do while I was on lunch. “Enjoy,” she called after me.

I planned on it. I had leftover pork steak, mang and potato in my lunch.
But as we all know, sometimes life has other plans for you.

I was walking along by the car/booster seat displays, making a list in my head of the seats I would need to stock when I got back from lunch when I came up solid against someone.

Lifting my head, I opened my mouth to apologize for not watching where I was going but that’s not what came out of me at all.

“What are you doing here?”

Monday, August 4, 2008

Hello Everyone!

Just wanted to let you all know that I finally got my Internet connection up and running completely. I've got a couple more boxes of stuff to unpack and then I should be completely moved! YAY!!! Anyway, I'll be posting tomorrow.

Have a great day!

Angela

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Not The Desired Effect

While the kids were chatting about what they wanted to do for the show, I decided it was a good time to slink off into the wings and see what goodies were lurking there for us to use for our show. I was surrounded by old props from the drama clubs various plays when Josh appeared again.

“Hey,” I flashed him a smile. It was going to be a long production if Josh and I didn’t get along so I figured I should try to be as friendly as possible. “What do you think?” I swung a purple feather boa around my neck and posed. “Is it me?”

“Not quite…” he chuckled and scanned the floor. “Here, try this.” He scooped up a pair of star sunglasses. “And this…” As I slipped on the sunglasses, he plopped an oversized straw hat onto my head.

“How do I look now?” I laughed, knowing I looked completely silly.

His expression became serious all of a sudden. “Beautiful,” he stated, his hands sliding down my arms. “You always look beautiful, you know this.”
I sighed. He killed my mood. I pulled the hat off my head, dropping it into the box I found it in; the sunglasses followed shortly after.

“You aren’t going to say anything?”

I turned away.

“Are you going to be like this for the whole show?”

“Like what?”

“You know what I’m talking about,” he replied.

“Umm, no.” I chuckled. “If I knew I wouldn’t ask.”

“I told you already, we need to talk.”

I shook my head. “We don’t.” I started to walk away when his arm shoot out, stopping me in my tracks. “Drop your arm.”

“No,” he lowered his arm enough to wrap it around my waist. “We need to talk Anna.”

Lifting my chin, I stared into his eyes. “Talk never got us anywhere Josh.”

He looked like he was going to argue that but finally he nodded slightly. “You’re right, talk didn’t get us anywhere, this always did though.”

Before I could even comprehend what he was talking about, Josh lowered his head. As his lips captured mine, his arm slipped around me, pulling me to him. My eyes widened in shock, as I pressed my lips tightly together; I couldn’t believe he was doing this. Hands that were hanging freely at my sides, jumped to his chest. Using all the strength I had, I pushed against him, his arm tightened around me.

I wasn’t having any of that, I quickly removed one hand from his chest and swung at him, my hand not doing much damage as it struck his cheek but it was enough for him to pull back.

Although it wasn’t enough for me, I slapped him again. “Don’t you ever do that again!”

Stumbling over the props on the floor, I started to walk away, only to stop again. This time it wasn’t Josh who stopped me.

“Jordan?” I couldn’t believe my luck. Seriously, what were the odds? I wanted to ask him what he was doing there but all words died on my lips as he turned his eyes towards me. He looked so angry and hurt as he answered my unspoken question.

“It’s 5:20, we are suppose to meet Wanda at 5:30.” Hurt, more so than anger, sounded through in his words. “We were still going…?”

“Yes,” I moved towards him. “I’ve been looking forward to this all day.”
“Yeah?” He sounded so unsure at that moment that I hated myself, even though it was Josh I should’ve been upset with.

I nodded, “Yes.”

Jordan glanced over my shoulder at Josh before looking back at me. “We should go then.”

Reaching out his hand, he swept the curtain back so I could pass and then he followed me out onto the stage.

“I just have to grab my stuff and…” I trailed off when I spotted my nieces sitting on the edge of the stage talking with a couple of their friends while they waited, for me, because they were supposed to be staying at Jordan’s with me that night.

“Good, you found her, we can go now.” Cassie pushed off the stage. “I already got your stuff….” She trailed off, frowning. “Is everything ok?”

I glanced at Jordan, his attention was on something else; I turned in time to see Josh join us.

“Are we going?” Cassie asked slowly, her eyes jumping back and forth between Jordan and Josh.

Nodding, I reached for my bag to grab my keys. “Jordan and I have to meet with Wanda, why don’t you take my car and ­–”

“Can’t we go with you?” Lindsay asked.

“I…” I hesitated because I didn’t know if Jordan was in the mood to go house hunting with me at the moment, let alone have the girls tailing along.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Jordan shrug. “I don’t have a problem with it but we have to go right now.”

The girls squealed and then started to talk excitedly amongst themselves as they headed towards the door.

“Thank you,” I smiled at Jordan. “You just made their day.”

“No problem,” Jordan stated.

I started to move forward only to realize Jordan didn’t move. I turned to find him staring at Josh. Closing my eyes, I prayed that nothing would happen. But something did.

Jordan told Josh to have a good night.

Josh was visibly stunned by this. He didn’t say a word as Jordan turned to me and smiled, really smiled. “Ready?” He held out his hand to me.

“Ready,” I had to bit my lip to stop from smiling like a fool as I slipped my hand into his.

Outside, in the cold darkening November evening, as he held his truck door open for me Jordan took a deep breath and let it out. When I turned to look at him, he told me he never doubted me for a second. “I’m glad you slapped him,” he whispered as he lowered his head so the girls wouldn’t hear.

“I didn’t want him to do that,” I told him.

“I know,” he reached up and rubbed his jaw. “I can’t blame the man for trying when I did the same damn thing.” He shook his head. "It seemed right at the time but it was a jack ass move. I'm sorry Babe."

I agreed. “It was a jack ass move. Although was a difference.”

He told me there was no difference but I insisted that there was. “What’s the difference?” He wanted to know.

I grinned, wrapping my arms around his neck. “The difference is, I kissed you back.”

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Yakkity Yak

Without skipping a beat, I continued to address students in a cool, calm and sometimes funny manner; I was determined not to let what he said get to me. Unlike him, I didn’t think that bringing our past up in front of a group of kids that he had to deal with everyday was the smart thing to do – it didn’t matter that no one but me heard what he said.

“I know you all have expressed interest in performing on stage, which is great, we certainly appreciate it but with that said, I feel that I should tell you that, more than likely, not everyone can perform – we only have three hours of show time.”

Before I had even finished the kids were talking amongst themselves and they didn’t sound too happy about it, if you were to go by the increase in the noise level and the rude remarks.

“Wait…” I tried to get their attention but they weren’t listening at all.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Josh bring the whistle to his mouth again and I quickly covered my ears. Like before, he blew it loud and hard, until all the kids were silent once again. “Before you start complaining,” he snapped. “You should let Anna finish.”

My eyes widened as he turned to me. “What?”

Instead of saying anything, I shook my head and returned my attention to the kids. “Yes,” I flashed them a smile, despite wanting to rip Josh’s head off for being such a jerk. “Like I was saying, we don’t have a lot of show time but that doesn’t mean that you can’t help out with the show.”

“What else is there to do?” A male voice called from the seats.

“I’m glad you asked,” I turned to Josh, who was paying more attention to me than the kids. “Coach Baker has, in his hands,” I shoved my clipboard at him. “Sign up sheets for various things – performing, set design, production assistants, ticket sellers, advertising assistants…” I chuckled. “The list goes on and on guys. We need a lot of help with this show, we have a month to pull it together and as you can see,” I motioned around the room. “We are it, this show is our baby and it needs a lot of TLC.”

Instead of moving to make the sign up sheets available for those who wished to sign them, Josh remained in place and did nothing. “Oh for the love of God,” I muttered. “Do I have to do everything?”

“I want to talk to you,” he told me.

“Well,” I pulled my clipboard back again. “I have nothing to say to you that doesn’t involve this show.”

He started to protest but I couldn’t be bothered to take the time to listen, I had certain goals set for the first meeting with the kids and I wanted to achieve them. Plus, at 5:30 that evening, Jordan and I were going to meet with Wanda to view houses that fit our needs.

“The sign up sheets are here,” I waved my clipboard in the air. “Read the list, think about what you want to do and then sign your name.” A couple students came forward the moment I dropped the clipboard onto the stage.

“Ok, so, anyone wishing to perform, we’ll need to have a little ‘audition’ and we’ll need to know what your final piece is going to be for the show – you’ll have until next Monday to think about that one. Those who wish to do set design, we have a basic idea of what we want but it’s still open to suggestion. Remember, we will have to take into account the various acts and accommodate all of them equally. Anyone who is artistically inclined –” I paused, scanning the crowd for Lindsay, who I told to be there because I would like her help with the posters; she waved at me from the seats. “We need posters, and lots of them. We’ll need a name for the show, a few different designs and we’ll need to go around town and ask various stores if we can hang them up on their community boards. Also, don’t forget the reason we are doing this –“

“For the kids!” Cassie shouted out when I paused.

I laughed, “That’s right Cass, we are doing this for the kids –those who deserve to have the same joyous Christmas that you all have but aren’t able to because of various reasons. All money raised by us will be split between Santa’s Elves and the Food Bank – so please make note of that somewhere on your posters.”

“What about the production stuff?” Someone asked as I turned to go into the back rooms to see what was there that we could use.

“Oh!” I completely forgot about that assignment. “The people who sign up for that role will be sort of a go between for Coach Baker, me and the other groups. We’ll need people who are organized, outgoing and able to handle pressure. I won’t lie, it’s a difficult role and you’ll probably feel stressed and pulled in every direction but I promise it will be rewarding come December when we show the town what we can do.”

When I finished, I asked if there were any more questions and Cassie asked where we stood on the other ideas we had for the show. “Are we allowed to do the intermission bake sale, Aunt Anna? And what about the door prizes? Are we allowed to do that?”

These were questions I didn’t have the answers to. “Coach?”

Josh cleared his throat as he came forward. As he stood way too close to me, he told everyone that the bake sale wouldn’t be an issue but he would have to check into the door prizes. “Anna and I still have a few things to discuss regarding the door prizes.” Turning to me, he told me that he thought it was a good time to talk. “About the door prizes, of course.”

I had a feeling he just threw that in there so I would agree to talk to him.

“Thank you Cassie for reminding me,” I said as I grinned. “Guess what that means guys? We need people to take the bake sale project in hand and see if we can get a few dozen different items for the sale. And, if we can do the door prizes, we’ll need the people selling tickets to make sure that everyone knows not to lose their tickets!”

The kids were no longer listening to me; the air was a buzz with excitement and talk of who was going to sign up for what.

“I believe this leaves enough time for us to have that talk,” Josh told me as he motioned towards the back corner of the stage.

“But the kids –”

“They are all wrapped up in the sign up sheet right now.”

“Ok,” I reluctantly agreed. “Just let me grab Cassie…”

Josh’s hand shot out to stop me. “Afraid to talk to me alone Anna?”

“No,” I chuckled. “If we are going to be talking about the door prizes, Cassie should be involved, it was her idea you know.”

Josh nodded. “I know it was her idea but do you think it’s wise to pull her into this when we might not even be able to do it? The principal is going to want to know where you, not Cassie, plan on getting the prizes.”

“Well, we aren’t going to be talking to the principal right now, so what difference does it make?” He started to speak but I interrupted. “And you know what? I think it’s wrong for him not to want to hear what Cassie has to say. Isn’t the whole idea of projects like this to help develop a student’s ability to arrange stuff like this for the future? Wouldn’t it be a good idea to give the students a little more responsibility and make them accountable while giving them guidance and a helping hand?”

I guess he had nothing to say to that because he turned and walked away from me.