Not The Desired Effect

While the kids were chatting about what they wanted to do for the show, I decided it was a good time to slink off into the wings and see what goodies were lurking there for us to use for our show. I was surrounded by old props from the drama clubs various plays when Josh appeared again.

“Hey,” I flashed him a smile. It was going to be a long production if Josh and I didn’t get along so I figured I should try to be as friendly as possible. “What do you think?” I swung a purple feather boa around my neck and posed. “Is it me?”

“Not quite…” he chuckled and scanned the floor. “Here, try this.” He scooped up a pair of star sunglasses. “And this…” As I slipped on the sunglasses, he plopped an oversized straw hat onto my head.

“How do I look now?” I laughed, knowing I looked completely silly.

His expression became serious all of a sudden. “Beautiful,” he stated, his hands sliding down my arms. “You always look beautiful, you know this.”
I sighed. He killed my mood. I pulled the hat off my head, dropping it into the box I found it in; the sunglasses followed shortly after.

“You aren’t going to say anything?”

I turned away.

“Are you going to be like this for the whole show?”

“Like what?”

“You know what I’m talking about,” he replied.

“Umm, no.” I chuckled. “If I knew I wouldn’t ask.”

“I told you already, we need to talk.”

I shook my head. “We don’t.” I started to walk away when his arm shoot out, stopping me in my tracks. “Drop your arm.”

“No,” he lowered his arm enough to wrap it around my waist. “We need to talk Anna.”

Lifting my chin, I stared into his eyes. “Talk never got us anywhere Josh.”

He looked like he was going to argue that but finally he nodded slightly. “You’re right, talk didn’t get us anywhere, this always did though.”

Before I could even comprehend what he was talking about, Josh lowered his head. As his lips captured mine, his arm slipped around me, pulling me to him. My eyes widened in shock, as I pressed my lips tightly together; I couldn’t believe he was doing this. Hands that were hanging freely at my sides, jumped to his chest. Using all the strength I had, I pushed against him, his arm tightened around me.

I wasn’t having any of that, I quickly removed one hand from his chest and swung at him, my hand not doing much damage as it struck his cheek but it was enough for him to pull back.

Although it wasn’t enough for me, I slapped him again. “Don’t you ever do that again!”

Stumbling over the props on the floor, I started to walk away, only to stop again. This time it wasn’t Josh who stopped me.

“Jordan?” I couldn’t believe my luck. Seriously, what were the odds? I wanted to ask him what he was doing there but all words died on my lips as he turned his eyes towards me. He looked so angry and hurt as he answered my unspoken question.

“It’s 5:20, we are suppose to meet Wanda at 5:30.” Hurt, more so than anger, sounded through in his words. “We were still going…?”

“Yes,” I moved towards him. “I’ve been looking forward to this all day.”
“Yeah?” He sounded so unsure at that moment that I hated myself, even though it was Josh I should’ve been upset with.

I nodded, “Yes.”

Jordan glanced over my shoulder at Josh before looking back at me. “We should go then.”

Reaching out his hand, he swept the curtain back so I could pass and then he followed me out onto the stage.

“I just have to grab my stuff and…” I trailed off when I spotted my nieces sitting on the edge of the stage talking with a couple of their friends while they waited, for me, because they were supposed to be staying at Jordan’s with me that night.

“Good, you found her, we can go now.” Cassie pushed off the stage. “I already got your stuff….” She trailed off, frowning. “Is everything ok?”

I glanced at Jordan, his attention was on something else; I turned in time to see Josh join us.

“Are we going?” Cassie asked slowly, her eyes jumping back and forth between Jordan and Josh.

Nodding, I reached for my bag to grab my keys. “Jordan and I have to meet with Wanda, why don’t you take my car and ­–”

“Can’t we go with you?” Lindsay asked.

“I…” I hesitated because I didn’t know if Jordan was in the mood to go house hunting with me at the moment, let alone have the girls tailing along.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Jordan shrug. “I don’t have a problem with it but we have to go right now.”

The girls squealed and then started to talk excitedly amongst themselves as they headed towards the door.

“Thank you,” I smiled at Jordan. “You just made their day.”

“No problem,” Jordan stated.

I started to move forward only to realize Jordan didn’t move. I turned to find him staring at Josh. Closing my eyes, I prayed that nothing would happen. But something did.

Jordan told Josh to have a good night.

Josh was visibly stunned by this. He didn’t say a word as Jordan turned to me and smiled, really smiled. “Ready?” He held out his hand to me.

“Ready,” I had to bit my lip to stop from smiling like a fool as I slipped my hand into his.

Outside, in the cold darkening November evening, as he held his truck door open for me Jordan took a deep breath and let it out. When I turned to look at him, he told me he never doubted me for a second. “I’m glad you slapped him,” he whispered as he lowered his head so the girls wouldn’t hear.

“I didn’t want him to do that,” I told him.

“I know,” he reached up and rubbed his jaw. “I can’t blame the man for trying when I did the same damn thing.” He shook his head. "It seemed right at the time but it was a jack ass move. I'm sorry Babe."

I agreed. “It was a jack ass move. Although was a difference.”

He told me there was no difference but I insisted that there was. “What’s the difference?” He wanted to know.

I grinned, wrapping my arms around his neck. “The difference is, I kissed you back.”

Yakkity Yak

Without skipping a beat, I continued to address students in a cool, calm and sometimes funny manner; I was determined not to let what he said get to me. Unlike him, I didn’t think that bringing our past up in front of a group of kids that he had to deal with everyday was the smart thing to do – it didn’t matter that no one but me heard what he said.

“I know you all have expressed interest in performing on stage, which is great, we certainly appreciate it but with that said, I feel that I should tell you that, more than likely, not everyone can perform – we only have three hours of show time.”

Before I had even finished the kids were talking amongst themselves and they didn’t sound too happy about it, if you were to go by the increase in the noise level and the rude remarks.

“Wait…” I tried to get their attention but they weren’t listening at all.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Josh bring the whistle to his mouth again and I quickly covered my ears. Like before, he blew it loud and hard, until all the kids were silent once again. “Before you start complaining,” he snapped. “You should let Anna finish.”

My eyes widened as he turned to me. “What?”

Instead of saying anything, I shook my head and returned my attention to the kids. “Yes,” I flashed them a smile, despite wanting to rip Josh’s head off for being such a jerk. “Like I was saying, we don’t have a lot of show time but that doesn’t mean that you can’t help out with the show.”

“What else is there to do?” A male voice called from the seats.

“I’m glad you asked,” I turned to Josh, who was paying more attention to me than the kids. “Coach Baker has, in his hands,” I shoved my clipboard at him. “Sign up sheets for various things – performing, set design, production assistants, ticket sellers, advertising assistants…” I chuckled. “The list goes on and on guys. We need a lot of help with this show, we have a month to pull it together and as you can see,” I motioned around the room. “We are it, this show is our baby and it needs a lot of TLC.”

Instead of moving to make the sign up sheets available for those who wished to sign them, Josh remained in place and did nothing. “Oh for the love of God,” I muttered. “Do I have to do everything?”

“I want to talk to you,” he told me.

“Well,” I pulled my clipboard back again. “I have nothing to say to you that doesn’t involve this show.”

He started to protest but I couldn’t be bothered to take the time to listen, I had certain goals set for the first meeting with the kids and I wanted to achieve them. Plus, at 5:30 that evening, Jordan and I were going to meet with Wanda to view houses that fit our needs.

“The sign up sheets are here,” I waved my clipboard in the air. “Read the list, think about what you want to do and then sign your name.” A couple students came forward the moment I dropped the clipboard onto the stage.

“Ok, so, anyone wishing to perform, we’ll need to have a little ‘audition’ and we’ll need to know what your final piece is going to be for the show – you’ll have until next Monday to think about that one. Those who wish to do set design, we have a basic idea of what we want but it’s still open to suggestion. Remember, we will have to take into account the various acts and accommodate all of them equally. Anyone who is artistically inclined –” I paused, scanning the crowd for Lindsay, who I told to be there because I would like her help with the posters; she waved at me from the seats. “We need posters, and lots of them. We’ll need a name for the show, a few different designs and we’ll need to go around town and ask various stores if we can hang them up on their community boards. Also, don’t forget the reason we are doing this –“

“For the kids!” Cassie shouted out when I paused.

I laughed, “That’s right Cass, we are doing this for the kids –those who deserve to have the same joyous Christmas that you all have but aren’t able to because of various reasons. All money raised by us will be split between Santa’s Elves and the Food Bank – so please make note of that somewhere on your posters.”

“What about the production stuff?” Someone asked as I turned to go into the back rooms to see what was there that we could use.

“Oh!” I completely forgot about that assignment. “The people who sign up for that role will be sort of a go between for Coach Baker, me and the other groups. We’ll need people who are organized, outgoing and able to handle pressure. I won’t lie, it’s a difficult role and you’ll probably feel stressed and pulled in every direction but I promise it will be rewarding come December when we show the town what we can do.”

When I finished, I asked if there were any more questions and Cassie asked where we stood on the other ideas we had for the show. “Are we allowed to do the intermission bake sale, Aunt Anna? And what about the door prizes? Are we allowed to do that?”

These were questions I didn’t have the answers to. “Coach?”

Josh cleared his throat as he came forward. As he stood way too close to me, he told everyone that the bake sale wouldn’t be an issue but he would have to check into the door prizes. “Anna and I still have a few things to discuss regarding the door prizes.” Turning to me, he told me that he thought it was a good time to talk. “About the door prizes, of course.”

I had a feeling he just threw that in there so I would agree to talk to him.

“Thank you Cassie for reminding me,” I said as I grinned. “Guess what that means guys? We need people to take the bake sale project in hand and see if we can get a few dozen different items for the sale. And, if we can do the door prizes, we’ll need the people selling tickets to make sure that everyone knows not to lose their tickets!”

The kids were no longer listening to me; the air was a buzz with excitement and talk of who was going to sign up for what.

“I believe this leaves enough time for us to have that talk,” Josh told me as he motioned towards the back corner of the stage.

“But the kids –”

“They are all wrapped up in the sign up sheet right now.”

“Ok,” I reluctantly agreed. “Just let me grab Cassie…”

Josh’s hand shot out to stop me. “Afraid to talk to me alone Anna?”

“No,” I chuckled. “If we are going to be talking about the door prizes, Cassie should be involved, it was her idea you know.”

Josh nodded. “I know it was her idea but do you think it’s wise to pull her into this when we might not even be able to do it? The principal is going to want to know where you, not Cassie, plan on getting the prizes.”

“Well, we aren’t going to be talking to the principal right now, so what difference does it make?” He started to speak but I interrupted. “And you know what? I think it’s wrong for him not to want to hear what Cassie has to say. Isn’t the whole idea of projects like this to help develop a student’s ability to arrange stuff like this for the future? Wouldn’t it be a good idea to give the students a little more responsibility and make them accountable while giving them guidance and a helping hand?”

I guess he had nothing to say to that because he turned and walked away from me.

Just Throw It Out There

When Josh finished reading over my notes, he looked over his shoulder. “What the hell are you doing?”

“Taking measurements,” I told him as he leapt to his feet.

“Get down from there,” he demanded as he gripped hold of the ladder I was using. “Are you trying to hurt yourself?”

Rolling my eyes, I ignored his overbearing, condescending tone as I turned back to what I was doing – trying to figure out the distance from the stage to the bottom of the foot long curtain border that ran the length of the ceiling.

“Anna!”

Glaring down at him, I told him to go away. “I was fine until you came over,” I snapped at him. “If I fall of this damn ladder it’ll be your fault for scaring me!”

I didn’t think he was going to back down; he just stood with his hands on the ladder staring up at me with that stubborn look on his face. “Just hurry up,” he looked away. “I want to talk about your notes before the kids show up.”

It took a couple minutes to get the tape to cooperate with me but when I finally had the measurement written on my rough sketch of the stage, I descended the ladder and went to move it to my next location but Josh wouldn’t release his grip on it. “Come on Josh, I don’t have all night, I need to get a couple more before I’m done.”

“We need to talk about the notes before the kids –”

“Well start talking,” I told him as I yanked the ladder from his hands. “I can talk and measure at the same time – I’m talented that way.”

So while I went around and finished up my measurements, Josh followed close behind me and asked questions or added his ideas to what Cassie and I had come up with. For the most part, everything was good, we didn’t have any conflicting issues with school policy and Josh was agreeable on most things except for…

“Who’s John?” He asked as I leaned over the top of the ladder to take my last measurement. When I asked him what he was talking about he turned my clipboard my way and pointed to something I wrote in the margin. “You have him penciled in here by the set build with a question.”

“Oh,” I picked up my pencil, wrote the last measurement on my sketch and sat down on the top of the ladder. “I thought I would ask him to help with the set build but now that we don’t have any parent volunteers, I think I should ask him to oversee it because we’ll be busy with everything else.”

“Ok but...” Josh glanced at the notes and then back at me. “Who is he?”

“Oh,” I flashed him a smile. “He’s Jordan’s dad.”

“No.” Josh snapped as he spun around to stalk back to where my stuff was still sitting on the stage.

“What do you mean ‘no’?” I hurried down the ladder and went after him.
Josh jumped off the stage, “He doesn’t have a kid in the show, and we don’t need his help.”

I stopped short at the edge of the stage, “Is that so?”

“Yes.”

“Ok then,” I jumped off the stage, shoved my stuff into my bag and then marched over to where he was standing, watching me. Snatching my clipboard from his hand, I told him I didn’t have a kid in the show either. As I walked away from him, I threw, “Have fun making this show happen on your own Josh.”

“God!” He growled as his fingers circled my elbow. “Why do you have to be so frustrating?”

Turning, I wrenched my arm from his grasp. “Why do you have to be so stubborn? We don’t have time to argue about this Josh, the show is in a month and we haven’t gotten anything started. Yeah, John doesn’t have a kid in the show and yeah, he is Jordan’s dad and you have a problem with that but you have to get over it or we can’t work together.”

“Get over it?”

“Yes,” I snapped. “Get over it!”

“Get over it?” He repeated as his hands shot out, gripped my wrists and yanked me forward, against his hard body. Lowering his head, he sighed against my ear. “Don’t think I haven’t tried to get over you.”

“We need him Josh,” I told him softly. “We need someone who knows how to build and –”

Shaking his head, he pulled back to stare down at me. “We don’t need him, my dad can do it.” His hands released my wrists and slid up my arms. “Anna,” he smiled. “We don’t need Jordan or his dad.”

“But you see,” I gazed into his bright blue eyes. “You may not need Jordan but I do.”

Closing his eyes, Josh turned away like I slapped him. “I’ll be back,” he mumbled as he brushed past me and stalked towards the doorway. Light streamed into the darken theatre as Josh busted through the doors and disappeared into the daylight.

After the doors had slammed shut, I slumped into a nearby chair and wondered if it would get any easier for him.

One….two…five…and then ten minutes went by. I heard the school bell ring in the distance but Josh still hadn’t come back. I would be surrounded by 60 or so kids, all chatting and waiting for something to happen before I would see Josh appear at the entrance.

He didn’t say a word to any one as he strode purposely across the room towards the stage and me. When he was in front of me on the stage, he met my eyes briefly before turning towards all the kids. Gripping the metal whistle that swung over his chest, he brought it to his lips and blew as hard as he should, causing most of the people in the room to flinch as they hurried to cover their ears.

“Ok, listen up everyone!” He shouted over the silent room. “We have a job to do here so let’s get started.” He turned to me but wouldn’t look at me. “Anna, please tell everyone what they have to do.”

I gave him a smile. "Good afternoon," I turned my attention to the kids. "As some of you know, I'm Anna, Cassie and Lindsay's aunt, and I-"

In the middle of what I was saying, Josh leaned in and whispered, “I still love you.”

Getting The Show On The Road

It was the first Monday in November and instead of being on the highway driving home or turning into Jordan’s driveway; I was driving down the back alley that would lead me to the parking lot behind the high school.

Maybe it was because I really wasn’t looking forward to the meeting. Maybe it was the fact that seeing Josh wasn’t high on my priority list. Either way, I was running late. I hated being late but as I rushed in through the doors of the school, I was kind of glad that I was, it meant that I wouldn’t be stuck spending too much time alone with Josh.

Crossing the common room, I made my way towards the gym to Josh’s office, only to find his door locked and no one around to tell me when he would be back. Left with no other choice, I returned to the common room so I could make my way down the hallway towards the front of the school where the main offices were located.

The first person I saw when I turned the corner in enter the front office was Jack, Josh’s best friend. “Hey Anna,” he didn’t seem all that surprised to see me. “Can’t find Josh?”

“No, he wasn’t in his office.”

After a brief explanation, Jack told me that Josh was across the parking lot in the drama building. “Makes sense don’t you think? Since that is where the show is going to take place.”

With a ‘thanks’ thrown over my shoulder, I hurried out of the office, heading back the way I came.

As I made the trek from the school to the drama building, I wondered why neither Cassie nor Josh mentioned that little detail when I spoke to both of them about the show. Would’ve saved me some time, I thought. And I wouldn’t be as late as I am now.

Slipping a little as I walked the last couple steps to the front door of the drama building I couldn’t help but wonder if Josh and all the other parent volunteers would think I wasn’t committed to helping out since I was so late – almost a half hour late.

Gripping the cold handle of the huge double door, I yanked it opened and walked into the dimly lit room, “Sorry I’m….” I trailed off as my eyes adjusted to the light and I realized there was no one around. “Oh shit,” I groaned. “I’m later than I thought!”

“No you’re not,” Josh’s voice came from somewhere in the darkness to my left where all the audience seating was.

“Are you sure?” I asked uncertainly. “I thought we were supposed to meet at 2:30? It’s almost 3.”

Dressed in his typical ‘coach’ gear – sweatpants, t-shirt and zippered hoodie - Josh appeared five feet away from me with his clipboard in hand. “We were,” he told me as he moved towards the stage to my right. Standing only three feet from the floor, it was easy for Josh to lower his body down to the stage as he told me that it looked like we were the only ones. “It seems that most of the kids ‘volunteered’ their parents without asking – they had no idea they were supposed to be doing anything for any show - or so I was told repeatedly when I called most of them this morning to make sure they were showing up this afternoon.”

“So….” I wandered over to where he was. “We have to do this ourselves?”

He nodded, “Looks like it.”

“Well hell,” I plopped down next to him. “This sucks!”

“Tell me about it,” he chuckled. “I was hoping for a lot of help….” He turned his head towards me. “I really have no clue where to start with this – it’s out of my league.”

I frowned, “Then why did you volunteer to be the teacher advisor on it Josh?”

He shrugged, “Cassie was so excited about the idea, I didn’t want to disappoint her by saying no.”

“She asked you, personally?” This shocked me.

“Well…” he shook his head. “Not because she wanted to. See, Clara, the drama teacher has her hands full with the drama club, getting them ready for some big drama competition in the city next month. She told Cassie she would love to help but she really didn’t have the time.”

“So Cassie asked you?”

He nodded, “Yeah she did.” He paused; I could feel his eyes on me. “Is that a problem Anna? Working with me?”

Smiling, I turned to meet his gaze. “I don’t think it’ll be a problem at all Josh. We are two adults; we should be able to make it through this in one piece.” Turning away, I flipped open the flap of my shoulder bag and pulled out my own clipboard. “When I got home last night –”

“How was your romantic weekend away with Jordan?”

Ignoring the seemingly sarcastic tone to his question, I flashed him a big smile. “It was everything I hoped it would be. Now,” I held out my clipboard to him. “Like I was saying, last night Cassie and I were talking and we managed to come up with some ideas for the show and how she wanted to go about raising the money for her charity. I think you should take a look at them and tell me what we can and can’t do since you are the expert on what the school policy is on stuff like this.”

Josh looked like he wanted to say something but I didn’t give him a chance. “While you are reading that, I’m going to take some measurements.” Returning to my bag, I pulled out a small hard covered notebook, a pencil and measuring tape.

“What are you taking measurements for?” He asked as I stood with my back to him and took in the stage setup.

“Why the set of course,” I threw over my shoulder. “Cassie and I were thinking that it would be cool to have a universal set that could be used in various different ways to compliment whatever it is that the students decide to do – be it sing, dance, or act.”

“Anna, where do you think you’ll get the money to build any sort of set? And who will do it? You?”

With a chuckle, I told him to read. “You’ll find all those answers and more in those pages you hold.”